


Nightingale

by Mr_Bilinski



Category: Glee
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Post-Finale
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-21
Updated: 2017-04-11
Packaged: 2018-03-30 23:47:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 20,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3956458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mr_Bilinski/pseuds/Mr_Bilinski
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After ten years of marriage, Blaine files for divorce because he thinks he isn't making Kurt happy. Reeling from the loss of his marriage, he temporarily moves in with Rachel and Jesse as he tries to reconstruct the rubble that was once his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Divorce

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter contains lyrics from Sweeney Todd and were written by Stephen Sondheim. In order to avoid spoilers, I can't say what it is, but you'll know when you see it.

"Kurt, I want--no, we need a divorce."

Eight words. After ten years of marriage, five years of happiness and starting a family, it only took eight words to bring it all crashing down like a game of Jenga. Wait, did he just say 'we'?

"I'm sorry," Kurt said, shocked, "and why do 'we' need a divorce? I mean, where did all of this come from?"

Blaine sighed softly as he hung his head down. He lightly tapped his fingertips together as he tried to piece together the right words to say. After what felt like an eternity to Kurt, but was really only five minutes, Blaine finally looked back up at him.

"I just think it would be best for you, Kurt. I know you're not happy and--"

"Where the hell is this coming from? Of course I'm happy, Blaine! I have you, the love of my life! I have a beautiful child, a beautiful house...why would you think I'm not happy?"

Blaine took a deep breath and said softly, "Your smile."

"What?" Kurt asked through a humorless chuckle.

"Everytime you've ever smiled at me, your eyes would sparkle and for the past three years...that hasn't been the case." Blaine shook his head as he chuckled softly to cover up a sob. He took another deep breath to calm down before he continued, "Your smile hasn't reached your eyes in such a long time--at least when it's directed at me."

Kurt slowly shook his head as he looked at his husband incredulously, "I'm hallucinating, aren't I? I-I have to be, because you're not making any damn sense right now."

"Kurt--"

"No, Blaine," Kurt chided. He opened his mouth to continue when a soft knock brought their attention over to the entrance to the living room.

"Daddy?" the little four year old boy asked sleepily as he rubbed his right eye with a little fist.

Kurt gave his husband a pointed look before he stood from the chair and crossed the room to their son. He crouched down in front of him and put his hands on both of his arms, smiling as the boy opened his hazel eyes. He brought up one of his hands and softly ruffled the boy's brown curly hair, "What is it, Hudson? Did you have another bad dream?"

Hudson pouted as he responded with a nod. Kurt sighed softly before he stood back up and took the boy's hand, "Come on, buddy. Let's get you back to bed."

Hudson pointed at Blaine, "But I wanna sit with you and Papa!"

Kurt raised his eyebrow at Blaine before he picked Hudson up, "I know you do, but Daddy and Papa need to chat about a few grown-up things right now, ok?"

Hudson pouted again but nodded anyways as Kurt carries him up the stairs. After he was tucked back in, Kurt turned to walk out the door when his son asked softly, "Will you sing me something, Daddy?"

Kurt paused at the door. He knew the little boy was stalling, but he couldn't turn him down for just one song, could he? Besides, Kurt Elizabeth Hummel never turned down a performance request--unless it involved fish nets. That will never happen.

He turned around and took a seat on his son's bed, wrapping an arm around him as he cuddled up to his dad's chest. Kurt started to rub soothing circles on Hudson's back as he sang softly,

'Nothin's gonna harm you, not while I'm around.  
Nothin's gonna harm you, no sir, not while I'm around.  
Demons are prowlin' everywhere nowadays.  
I'll send 'em howlin'. I don't care, I've got ways.'

He could feel his throat tighten as his eyes watered. He never told anyone, not even Blaine, that he'd heard his fiancee singing this song to him while he was in the hospital. Nevertheless, he fought through the urge to cry as he continued,

'No one's gonna hurt you, no one's gonna dare.  
Others can desert you. Not to worry; whistle, I'll be there.  
Demons will charm you with a smile for a while, but in time...  
Nothin's gonna harm you...  
Not while I'm...around...'

Kurt couldn't help but smile when he heard Hudson's soft snoring before he gently eased the boy off his chest and walked back downstairs. He took a look at Blaine and sighed heavily as he reached up to pinch the bridge of his nose.

"Kurt--"

"Don't." Kurt interrupted, "Blaine..." He sighed in exasperation as he rubbed his temples, "this isn't just about the two of us. It hasn't been for the past four years. Now I don't know what the hell is going on in your head, Blaine Anderson, but we can't do this to our son." His gaze hardened with his tone, "You can't do this to our son."

"Do you think I feel good about this, Kurt?" Blaine asked as his watery eyes flooded over and tears started rolling down his cheeks, "I don't make you happy anymore."

"Damn it, Blaine!" Kurt shouted before he winced, silently praying that Hudson didn't wake up. He shook his head as he rested his hands on his hips, "There's no changing your mind, is there?"

Blaine silently shook his head. Kurt let out a shaky breath before he crossed the room and sat down next to Blaine. He took the other man's hand into his own and said gently, "You're wrong. Honestly, these last few years have undoubtedly been the happiest of my life...and I wouldn't trade them for anything." He sniffled, "I'm happy with you; Hudson is happy with you. I'm not going to beg you to change your mind, so if you really want to walk away from all of this, then I won't stop you. But I want you to know that I will always love you, Blaine Warbler."

 

\-------- ---1 Year Later----------------

Kurt and Hudson stood outside looking up at the house. Hudson continued to look around the yard as Kurt closed his eyes and deeply inhaled. He sighed happily as he felt himself truly relax for the first time; and he hadn't even made it to the front door yet. 

Hudson lightly tugged on his father's sleeve as he looked up at him questioningly, "Daddy? Aren't we supposed to go in the house?"

Kurt softly chuckled as he ruffled his son's hair and smiled. "Yes, smarty pants, but I think we should probably knock first." He spared another moment to take everything in before he started to lead Hudson up to the front door of the house. It's not like he wouldn't have more time to walk down memory lane later.

As the two paused at the door, Hudson shrugged and reached out for the doorknob. Kurt gently grabbed his hand and lightly chastised, "Hudson Samuel Anderson-Hummel, what do you think you're doing?"

Hudson looked up and gave his dad an innocent smile as he shrugged again, "Aunt Rachel told me the door was always open for me." He pointed at the door, "I'm only five, but even I know that's not what an open door looks like."

Kurt sighed softly as he shook his head, "Huds, she didn't mean it literally."

"What's 'literally'?"

"It means she didn't mean exactly what she said."

Hudson's brow furrowed, "Why didn't she just say what she really meant, then?"

Kurt chuckled, "Because women are confusing; which you will find out for yourself when you are much older."

Hudson slightly pouted, "So we still have to knock?"

Kurt opened his mouth to answer when the door opened to reveal a tall brunette man with a friendly smirk who said, "Our favorite nephew never has to knock on our door!"

Hudson quickly beamed as he wrapped his arms around the man in a hug, "Uncle Jesse!" He giggled as Jesse picked him up, then turned his head toward his dad and said with a perfect imitation of Jesse's smirk, "So much for 'literally'."

Kurt shook his head as he muttered under his breath, "Don't bother, Kurt; they'll teach him later on in school...hopefully." He smiled as Jesse pulled him into a side hug, "Hey, Jesse. Where's Rachel?"

Jesse started to reply when soprano vocal runs flooded through the foyer behind him. He smiled and pointed his thumb toward the house, "Does that answer your question?"

Kurt chuckled with a nod before the three of them went inside. As Jesse set Hudson down on the floor, the boy suddenly ran off toward the living room as he called out, "Lionel? Here, boy!"

Jesse chuckled before he turned to Kurt and took him in, "You look rough, dude."

Kurt rolled his eyes gently, "Divorce will do that to you." 

Jesse grimaced sympathetically as he crossed his arms over his chest, "I know it's rough, Kurt, but you'll get through this. Rachel and I will make sure of it."

Kurt smiled, "Thank you, really. I..." He looked around the house and sighed, "I will be forever grateful for what the two of you are doing for me and Hudson. Dad sold the house and moved to D.C. with Carole, so--"

"Hey," Jesse said as he put a hand on Kurt's shoulder and shook his head, "we'd have been offended if you didn't accept our offer. So, forget about the divorce, leave Blainers...wherever the hell he is now...and start rebuilding."

Kurt drew in a shaky breath, "In order to rebuild, you need a foundation first. I don't even have that."

Jesse arched a brow, "Don't you? You have a son, Kurt. You have Hudson, you have yourself, you have both of your happiness to live for. If that's not a strong enough foundation to build on, then I guess it's a good thing I didn't pursue construction work."

Kurt cleared his throat to suppress the groan he desperately wanted to let out. Did he really think that he hadn't been considering his and Hudson's happiness with every decision he had made in the past year? He wanted to tell Jesse off, but the mature side of him reasoned to be gracious for the time being, considering Jesse had agreed to let them into his and Rachel's home.

"Kurt?" Rachel's voice called down the hallway as she made her way toward her best gay and husband. She giggled as she entered the room with Hudson in her arms, a small brown Pomeranian following closely behind, "I think you lost something."

Hudson laughed, "Aunt Rachel, you can't lose something if it runs away."

Kurt's smile faltered for a moment at his son's words before he approached his friend and gave her a peck on the cheek as he hugged her, "Hi, Rachel."

Sensing the inevitable heart-to-heart the two would probably want to share immediately after their reunion, Jesse clapped his hands together with a big smile and looked at the small boy, "Hey, Huds. How about we go get some ice cream and let Daddy and Aunt Rachel have some time to catch up?"

His eyes lighting up at the mention of ice cream, the boy asked hopefully, "Can Lionel come?"

Jesse scrunched his eyebrows, "Of course! It wouldn't be an ice cream trip without him!" 

Hudson threw up his hands and cheered before he called for Lionel to follow him and ran toward the front door. Kurt looked at Jesse gratefully and mouthed 'Thank you' before the other man nodded with a smile and left.

Kurt watched them leave with a smile before he turned back to Rachel. His friend reached out and rested her hand on his arm before she cocked her head and led him to the sitting room.

As she sat down in a cushioned chair and straightened her posture, she offered Kurt a sympathetic look, "What happened?"

 

\----------5 Months Ago-------------

 

The filing cabinet groaned as Kurt slid the drawer shut. Eying the papers in his hand, he let out a sigh then crossed the room and sat down, setting the papers on the table in front of him. He propped his elbow on the armrest of the chair, tapping his fingertips together as he contemplated with narrowed eyes.

Blaine had already moved out, deciding it would 'make everything easier'; as if that were possible. It was amazing to think that a few pieces of paper could change everything in his life. Kurt shook his head before he reached out and started to read the details of the divorce.

Blaine agreed to give him primary custody of Hudson under the stipulation that Kurt agreed to give him visiting rights and a month out of every summer. Kurt arched his brow as he read that before he shrugged, "Well, Hummel, it could be worse."

"Daddy?" Hudson asked shyly from the doorway.

Kurt looked up from the papers and frowned when his eyes fell on his son, "What's the matter, Huds? Did you have another nightmare?"

Hudson shook his head as he rubbed his eyes, then walked over to Kurt and climbed up into his lap. He wrapped his arms around Kurt's neck and rested his head on his shoulder, "Will Papa come back if I promise to be really, real good?"

Kurt softly gasped at his son's question and immediately rubbed soothing circles into Hudson's back, "No, baby. Papa didn't leave because you've been bad. He and I-- there's just...it's complicated, so complicated that I don't even think your dad and I completely understand it. Just know that none of this is about you, okay?" He planted a kiss on the top of his son's curly hair, "You don't need to change anything about yourself."

Hudson nodded before he rubbed his eyes and yawned. Kurt smiled and patted his back, "Why don't you run upstairs and I'll come read you a bedtime story in a few minutes?"

 

\------------Present--------------

 

Rachel put a hand to her chest, her brown eyes watering as Kurt finished telling her everything that had happened. She got up from her chair and enveloped him in a hug, "Oh, Kurt! I'm so sorry!"

"It's okay," Kurt said optimistically, "Well, okay not completely okay, but I'm getting there. The idea of Blaine and I lasting forever is beautiful and nice, but it's just not in the cards. He's been a perfect gentleman through all of this."

Rachel tilted her head to the side, "But that doesn't change the fact that it feels like a part of your heart's walked away." She grinned, "I know! Why don't we go to Lynx?!"

Kurt grimaced, "That gay club down on 43rd? Why?"

Rachel giggled, "Kurt, why not?! You're gay, you're young, you're hot, you're--"

"Recently divorced," Kurt interjected.

Rachel clicked her tongue, "All the more reason to go. Come on, it'll be fun! Jesse can keep an eye on Hudson, so what do you have to lose?"

"You mean besides eight full hours of sleep and my last remaining shreds of dignity?"

Rachel sighed, "I'm not saying you need to hook up with some stranger or-or try to fill some void. I just think that, after this whole divorce crap, you could use a chance to let off some steam."

Kurt cocked the corner of his mouth as he weighed his options before he conceded with a sigh, "Okay, you're on."

Rachel grinned, squealing in excitement as she wrapped him in another hug, "Oh, this is gonna be so much fun! They have drinks, and guys, and karaoke! Ah!"

 

As Rachel got up and started excitedly planning their night, Kurt watched her in amusement as he silently questioned what the hell he'd just signed up for.


	2. Chapter 2

This wasn't right. This was seriously, totally, undeniably, messed up. Kurt Hummel is a recently divorced father, spending his first night back in New York at a club while his son was left to adjust to a new environment alone.

Oh, who the hell does he think he's fooling? Hudson's peachy with a side of keen at Rachel's. He's got a dog, Jesse's X-Box One, a Wii, karaoke machine (for Rachel and Jesse's impromptu performances, which Hudson just ate up), and for some reason his son had the supernatural ability to withstand an indefinite time around Jesse and his ego. Obviously he had Rachel to thank for that.

Then again, the guy did let he and Blaine knock his wife up to bring unto them the little fella, so he couldn't be all that bad.

Damn, this is a good daiquiri.

He giggled silently as he changed his position on the stool where he sat by the bar. This was a really good idea. So far, he'd gotten three different men to buy him a drink, just by sitting there! He always just waited for them to approach, considering he wasn't exactly looking for anything. Luckily, none of them did. 

Although, he probably could have flirted that one guy into flashing him his abs. That would have been pretty. How does this daiquiri keep getting better? It was like magic or something. He rolled his eyes and slightly shook his head to himself. No, that would be ridiculous.

If he kept drinking it, he would be ridiculously drunk. He jumped when he felt a hand gently glide along his shoulder as a muscular blonde walked around to face him. The man flashed him a smirk as he said, "Did I scare you, sweetheart?"

Sweetheart? He cocked his brow as he considered his options. That smirk was just so cocky. He could be polite, or be too drunk to care.

Alright, Kurt. You've got to really turn him off. Ooh, this will be fun. He flashed him a smile then said, "To you, I'm 'there' and to me I'm 'here'. But, to you, you're 'here' and to me, you're 'there'."

The guy's smirk faltered, "What the hell?"

Kurt bit back a giggle. Why in the world was he telling him a riddle? Oh, what the hell; roll with it, Hummel. He crossed his arms and said, "We're both 'here' and 'there' at the same time. Technically, we're in two places at once."

The man shook his head as he turned and walked away, "That's the last time I hunt at the bar."

Kurt chuckled as he turned back to his drink and took another sip. Seriously, this thing should be given a freaking award. Rachel was still singing Defying Gravity, so he had a few minutes to spare before she'd be back. Hm, what's Blaine up to?

No, that's definitely a bad idea. Remember the voicemail incident. How the hell Mr. Schue didn't die of embarrassment was beyond his understanding. What about Chandler? Last time they talked, he seemed like he was ready to swear his undying allegiance to him.

Haha, that'd be fun. Seriously, Kurt; put down the daiquiri. 

"Hummel?"

Kurt felt his blood run cold for a moment at the familiar voice. No freaking way was he here! No! Not now! He put on a smile before he turned to look up at the man, "Smythe."

Sebastian chuckled as he took the seat next to Kurt, "What the hell are you doing back in New York? I thought you were in L.A.?"

Kurt furrowed his brow, "Blaine didn't tell you?"

Sebastian shook his head, "Haven't spoken to him in a while. Why; what happened?"

Kurt shrugged as he took another sip of his daiquiri. If he was going to get through this in one piece, he would need to be hammered.

"Blaine and I divorced. I moved in with Rachel for the time being."

Sebastian's smile fell. Was that guilt on his face? No, remorse. Wow, Sebastian Smythe can feel remorse? If he wasn't drunk, he would be shocked. But he is drunk, so shoo-shoo, shock. 

"Kurt, I'm--"

"Shhh," Kurt said dramatically as he shook a finger, "don't speak. It's over, finite. So... I guess you can finally go get him now."

"Well, that escalated quickly." Sebastian uttered under his breath, "I only went after him because it got to you so much. He isn't my type."

Kurt chuckled, "I thought your type was 'horny and ready'."

He smirked, "Are you trying to banter, Hummel? We're really gonna do this?"

Kurt smiled, "For old times sake?"

Sebastian chuckled, "Alright, Hummel." He eyed Kurt's daiquiri, "I see you've stuck to your seriously gay ways and chose the gayest drink to chase away your pains."

"That's a Cosmo," Kurt interjected, "that's the gayest drink. And I really should stop drinking this, so I'm kind of tempted to just slushie you." He then gave him a thoughtful look and added, "Oh, but don't worry. This one doesn't have rock salt in it."

Sebastian's eyes glistened, "Now, Gayface, you don't want to waste your drink on me. Your blatant turn to alcoholism depends on it."

Kurt narrowed his eyes, "Hey, look at that guy checking you out!" He smiled as he gestured toward the man. When Sebastian turned around to look, he said, "His head's kind of big, like a warthog's. Hey, your pet names could totally be Timon and Pumbaa."

Sebastian turned to him and sneered. Kurt snickered and asked, "Get it? Because you look like a meerkat and his head makes him look like--"

"Yeah, I get it," Sebastian interjected. He rolled his eyes before he looked Kurt over again, "Are you drunk?"

Kurt laughed as he nodded his head and said gleefully, "Yes, I am! Very!" He then stopped laughing and narrowed his eyes, "I'm in a bar, dumbass. Of course I'm drunk."

Sebastian smirked, "You're a bitch drunk."

Kurt fixed him with a glare, "I may be a bitch, but I will never be yours."

Sebastian shook his head, "I'm not that kinky."

Kurt giggled, "Who do you think you're kidding, Seb? We all know about the secret trunk under your bed."

Sebastian let out a sigh before he lowered his head, "Alright, I concede." He flashed Kurt a smile, "Feel better?"

Kurt returned his smile, "I do, actually. Thank you."

"Not a problem. We all need to let off some steam every now and then."

Kurt eyed him for a moment then glanced at the dance floor. A grin formed as he returned his gaze to Sebastian, "Why are you being so nice?"

"Well, I promised to turn over a new leaf, remember? Turns out I happen to like being nice."

Kurt cleared his throat before he jerked his head toward the dance floor, "Care to tango, Smythe?"

"Who the hell tangos at a club?"

"It's a figure of speech, Sebastian."

"I know."

Sebastian spotted Rachel headed their way and leaned in a little closer to say, "I'll have to take a rain check on that dance. Call me sometime, Princess." He slid a napkin to Kurt then walked away as Rachel approached.

"Was that Sebastian?" she asked as she pointed in his direction.

Kurt shrugged indifferently as he took another sip of his daiquiri, "Hell if I know; I'm lit."

Rachel looked at him skeptically, "Lit?"

"Mmhmm," he replied, "like a candle."

Rachel laughed as she squeezed his shoulder, "I told you this would be good for you!" She sat next to him and beamed, "So, how about a song?"

"Oh, no." Kurt denied with a shake of his head. "No singing, not from me. No sir, not tonight."

Rachel shrugged as she looked off in the direction Sebastian walked away in, "Are you going to go out with him?"

Kurt scoffed incredulously, "Are you kidding me? Rachel, there's no way in hell I'm going to go out with anybody, let alone the walking poster child of Meerkat Manor."

She shrugged as she tossed ger hair over her shoulder, "Well, you never know..."

Kurt groaned as he slid the now empty cup onto the bar counter, "I need another daiquiri."

 

\--------------------------------------

 

"Oh, I am never drinking daiquiris again," Kurt moaned as he rolled over in his bed. He threw the covers over his head, wishing that he could stay there forever. Of course, as every parent knows, that's something that is just never meant to be. 

"Daddy, Uncle Jesse says you have ten minutes to start making your famous waffles or else," Hudson said softly as he gently poked his dad's back.

"They're not my famous waffles, Huds; they're Eggo." Kurt muttered from under the covers.

"That's what I tried to tell him, but he said it's different when you make them."

"Ugh," Kurt threw back the covers and eyed Hudson, "is he my child or are you?"

Hudson giggled before he jumped onto the bed and cuddled with his dad, "Did you have fun last night?"

"Mmhmm, I did." Kurt said as he pulled his son closer to him, "But not as much fun as I would have had with you, of course."

"Because I'm the best son ever?"

"Because you're the best son ever," Kurt verified. He then stretched and sat up in the bed, "Okay, let's go feed Uncle Jesse before he releases the hound."

"Lionel's a Pomeranian..."

Kurt stared at his son then chuckled and ruffled his hair. He got out of bed and made his way downstairs to make waffles since Jesse clearly had no idea how to operate a toaster.

When he walked into the kitchen, he scratched the back of his head then opened the freezer to pull out the box of waffles. He stuck a few in and started to heat them up, then made himself a cup of coffee.

"I gotta hand it to you, Sparkles; you definitely know how to rock the hangover look."

Kurt nearly spit out his coffee as he did a double take and gasped, "Santana!"

The Latino smiled and waved from her seat at the dining table before she stood up and crossed the room, "Don't look so surprised, Lady Lips. I heard about your divorce and I wanted to check in on you."

Kurt's brow furrowed as he looked around, "Where's Jesse?"

Santana shrugged, "He's probably still sleeping; who cares? Now, how about you tell me how your club night went?" she asked with a knowing smirk.

Kurt sighed, "Coffee now, story later."

"Story?" Hudson asked as he entered the kitchen, "I love stories!"

"I know, but you're not getting any, you little traitor."

Hudson just shrugged and said, "Hey, what Auntie Snixxx wants..."

Santana smiled proudly as she ruffled his hair before she turned back to Kurt, "See? Even your little angel loves me."

"That's because you bribe him with money."

"Nuh uh!" Hudson denied with a shake of his head, "Aunt 'Tana bribes me with candy and doggie treats!"

Kurt slowly arched a brow as he fixed Santana with a glare, "You give my son dog treats?"

Santana shrugged indifferently, "I told you that too much Scooby Doo was bad for his brain."

Kurt rolled his eyes with a groan as he shook his head and took another sip of coffee. He'd forgotten Santana was such a bitch in the morning. He put on a smile and said, "So, what can I do for you, San?" 

Santana shrugged as she visually inspected Kurt, "Well, you seem to be in one piece--you always did take break-ups like a champ."

He snickered, "This wasn't a break-up, though." He stared out of the window and released a sigh before he turned to look back at her, "I don't know. I guess I'm just good at accepting things I can't change. Getting my life back on track, getting Hudson ready to start kindergarten, making sure he has the life he deserves--those are all things I can control. It's just, for the first time in ten years, I'm doing it all on my own."

"You're not alone, Kurt." Santana said as she rested a hand on top of his, "Between Rachel, me and Brit, we've all got your back, Hummel."


	3. Take Me Home Tonight

'I would give my soul for Jesse St. James to come down with laryngitis, right now. I don't even care if he doesn't get sick; just stop the singing!' Kurt thought to himself as Rachel and Jesse sang what had to be their hundredth number of the night. He softly chuckled to himself as he saw the annoyed glare Santana was shooting at the back of Hudson's head; the five year old continued to dance happily as his aunt and uncle continued their upbeat rendition of 'Can You Feel the Love Tonight?'. 

Santana glanced over to Kurt before she leaned over and whispered into his ear, "I don't know why you're laughing, but let Aunt 'Tana break it down for you: when you and Blaine essentially relived the conception of Rachel Berry--with Rachel Berry, of all people-- the three of you created your own unholy trinity of love, happiness, and the creepy obsession with impromptu Broadway show tunes. He's like, the gay, musical Antichrist."

Kurt's eyes widened as he lightly shoved Santana's shoulder and uttered through clenched teeth, "My child is not the Antichrist!"

"Whatever, not my point, Glitters. See, Rachel and Jesse are more than happy to supply your child with an unlimited supply of impromptu musical numbers; and Santana can skip out any time she wants."

"Okay, why are you talking in the third person?"

Santana rolled her eyes, "I'm exercising my freedom of speech, whatever. My point is that the only person in this room who is legally obligated to stay is you, so keep laughing."

Kurt sniggered with a shake of his head. Yes, Rachel and Jesse's impromptu performances could get rather...tedious, but if it meant putting a smile on his son's face, then he wouldn't have it any other way.

He obligingly applauded as they finished their song. Okay, so it wasn't exactly obligatory considering The Lion King was his secret Kryptonite. He turned his head toward Santana as she leaned in to whisper in his ear, "If the nonstop musical numbers ever gets to you, you and Hudson are more than welcome to come stay with me and Britt, k?"

He smiled thankfully and nodded his head, "Thank you, Santana. Hopefully we won't have to be sleeping on anyone's proverbial couch for too much longer. I have a job interview later on today."

Santana furrowed her brow, "But what about Vogue.com? Can't you go back there?"

"Well, sure," Kurt replied with a shrug, "but it's an unpaid internship, 'Tana."

"Well, where's this interview at?"

"Lynx," Kurt muttered.

Santana's eyes widened, "Wait, what?" She looked over at Rachel, Jesse, and Hudson and held up her finger, "We'll be back in a minute." She then pulled Kurt out of the room and smacked him in the arm, "Have all of these spontaneous musical numbers over the years finally turned your brains into glitter or have you actually lost your mind? Kurt Hummel, you cannot work at a freakin' gay bar!"

Kurt scoffed, "Why not?"

"Because it's bougie, that's why!" She shook her head when he rolled his eyes at her, "No, just listen, alright? How far can you really expect to go on a bartender's salary? If you leave the poor kid alone with Jesse St Gays and Marie Von Trapp, he might actually spontaneously combust or get diabetes from prolonged exposure to show tunes and Rachel's vocal chords." 

Kurt rolled his eyes with a subtle shake of his head, "He will _not_ spontaneously-- just stop." He shifted his gaze toward his son and arched a brow. He slightly pouted his bottom lip as he considered offering the coming month to Blaine. It would certainly give him a chance to raise some money without having to worry about finding a babysitter.

This was so wrong. Did he just consider pawning his _son_ off on his ex-husband? Well, it _was_ his other father, so it wasn't exactly a terrible idea. Was it?

"You know," Santana said in a singsong voice as a grin formed on her lips, "you could always see if he wants to visit Blaine?"

Crap, if Santana thought of it than it _had_ to be a terrible idea. Then why was he reaching for his phone and opening his contacts to call Blaine? He nodded to Santana as he placed the phone to his ear and headed out of the room.

It was only so he could work and only if Blaine agreed to take him. He didn't need to ask Hudson; he already knew he was missing his other dad. He shut the door behind him and leaned against the wall as he muttered under his breath, "Damn it, Blaine. Answer the stinkin' phone."

 _"Hello?"_ , Blaine's voice asked over the phone.

"Blaine, hi. Hey, uh, it's Kurt."

 _"I know,"_ , his voice chuckled. _"What's up?"_

"Uh, it's nothing, really. Well, kind of," he silently chided himself for being so awkward before he finally asked, "How would you feel about taking Hudson for the next month?"

 _"Uh, well..."_ Blaine sighed, _"I'm actually in the middle of moving right now."_

Kurt furrowed his brow. Why would he be moving out of the house? Was he--? Forget it; it's not like it's his concern anymore. 

"Oh," he said softly into the phone, "well, that's fine. I just figured I'd ask." He traced his arm with his free hand as he inquired, "Do you have any idea when you'll be ready? I'm not trying to rush; I just know he misses you." 

_"And I miss him, too. I really want to take him, Kurt; I just wouldn't be able to focus on him with everything that's going on. I'll have to--"_

"I understand," Kurt gently interrupted, "it's fine." 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 2 Months ago~~~~~~~~~~ 

"Hudson!" Kurt called out as he rushed through Sam's living room picking up the various toys. "If we don't leave now we won't have enough time to say goodbye to Papa before our flight!" 

Living in the house had only served to fuel the fire of Kurt's guilt. It was bad enough that he'd chosen to move with Hudson to New York, so he thought it would be fair if Blaine kept the house. Gosh, this divorce business was rather ugly.

"Hudson Samuel Anders--oh, forget it. Fine, if you don't want to say goodbye to Papa, that's your prerogative, but your little butt better be in the car in two minutes or I'm flying without you!"

"Why don't we just drive there in the first place?!" Hudson called from upstairs.

Kurt sighed exasperated, "Because I don't want to be stuck in rush hour! We won't need the car in New York anyway; let's go!"

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~Present~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kurt chewed on his bottom lip as he stared at his phone screen. In reality, he could always get Jesse or Rachel to babysit Hudson while he worked, but damn it if he didn't want the boy to see his other father. Every day that he caught Hudson staring at their old family picture, focused on Blaine's smiling face with longing, he mentally kicked himself for letting the man go so easily.

Should he have fought harder? Who was he kidding; putting up a fight at all would have been considered fighting harder. No, he knew the possible ramifications of their divorce and what they could mean for Hudson, and Kurt Hummel never forces anyone to stay in his life who doesn't want to.

He heard the door beside him open and shut with a soft click before Santana spoke, "Somehow Thelma and Louise put your little angel to sleep with their incessant ballads."

"Okay," he replied softly with a nod as he out his phone back into his pocket. He turned his head to look at her and said, "I'll go put him to bed."

Santana held up her hand with a firm shake of her head, "Uh-uh, Hummel. Let Berry put him to bed; you need to go get changed because Auntie 'Tana is going to take you to Lynx and show you how to _really_ get out of a slump at a bar."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

This was an absolutely _wonderful_ idea. They'd started out with a few shots and now Kurt was nursing his second daiquiri while he waited for Santana to return from the bathroom. He smiled affectionately at the ambrosial drink, the alcohol already making his entire body buzz with a mild numbness as he lifted the glass to take another swig.

"And we meet again," Sebastian said in a mildly cocky tone from Kurt's left. Normally he hated any form of cocky, but damn it if Sebastian's wasn't starting to seem endearing.

" 'Bastian!" Kurt said with a smile as he turned in his seat to look up at him. He gently tugged on his wrist, "Sit down; have a drink! I recommend the daiquiris."

Sebastian chuckled softly as he eyed the lone man occupying the seat Kurt gestured to, "I'm fine here."

Kurt arched a brow before his eyes settled on the stranger sitting next to him. He pursed his lips for a moment before he cleared his throat and said, "Excuse me, but do you mind scooting over a seat so my friend can sit there?"

The man drunkenly turned his head to Kurt and eyed them both before he snorted and turned back to his beer. 

Kurt's polite smile faded as the alcohol sparked an uncommon sense of daring confidence. He cleared his throat again and asked, "Excuse me?"

"You're excused," he replied gruffly before he took another swig of Blue Moon.

Kurt briefly glanced toward Sebastian before he straightened his posture and examined his fellow drunkard. The man seemed awfully out of place at a gay bar, considering his ratty attire and long wiry beard. With a smirk on his face he shrugged nonchalantly and uttered, "Suit yourself."

He quickly stood up and whispered into Sebastian's ear, "This is more than likely stupid because I'm really drunk, but just go with it." He gently pushed Sebastian into his seat before he shot him a sly grin and straddled his lap. He braced both of his hands on either side of Sebastian's face and leaned in, locking his lips onto Sebastian's with a longing moan.

Sebastian would be lying if he said he wasn't taken aback by this, but when was he ever known for turning down some action, even if it was Kurt Hummel? He moaned into the kiss himself as he rested his hands on Kurt's hips.

Sensing the stranger's discomfort, Kurt decided to turn up the heat and started gyrating his hips into Sebastian's lap, eliciting another moan from both participants until they heard the man grunt and storm away from the bar.

Kurt backed away from the kiss with a grin as he chuckled softly, "I knew that'd work. Sorry about that."

"I don't remember anything worth being sorry for," Sebastian replied with his own chuckle. "You're a good kisser, Hummel."

"Hm," Kurt replied in mock consideration, "you're not so bad yourself, Smythe."

"What the hell is this, Hummel? I leave you alone for five minutes to go freshen up and you end up in some guy's lap? Wanky," Santana quipped as she approached the two with a proud grin. When her eyes locked into Sebastian's, her grin faltered, "Oh, for the love of--really, Kurt?"

Kurt shrugged as he waved his hand dismissively and scooted off of Sebastian's lap onto the vacant seat, "You had to be there, San."

"Yeah, I'm sure," she replied skeptically. She shook it off and held up her hands, "You know what? To each his own."

"Great!" Kurt said with a smile, "So sit your ass down because I need another daiquiri and the two of you need to try one! I'm buying."

Four more daiquiris, a Screaming Orgasm and a cab ride later, Kurt, Sebastian and Santana drunkenly entered Rachel and Jesse's house laughing quietly so they wouldn't wake anyone up. Alcohol may sprout little horns on top of Kurt's head, but he'd be damned if he was going to risk anyone waking his son up.

"Okay, I'm going to bed," Santana slurred as she made her way to the couch and fell back onto it with a giggle. She threw her hands up and said, "Well, here I am!"

Sebastian snickered as Kurt offered her a goodnight before he led him up to his room. They'd tried to drop him off at his apartment, but his roommate locked him out and the dumbass left his key inside; a point Kurt was more than willing to drunkenly point out.

As they entered the room, Sebastian offered, "Do you have any spare blankets anywhere? I can just make a little pallet on the floor. I really appreciate this, Kurt."

Kurt contemplated looking for blankets before he shrugged it off. He was too drunk to care about such trivial things at the moment, "Don't be ridiculous; we can share the bed."

Sebastian arched a brow, "Are you sure?"

Kurt scoffed as he pulled the covers back on the bed, "I made out with you at a bar as I ground my hips into your lap. I'm fairly certain that tops sharing a bed."

"You've been doing it wrong, then," he replied with a smirk.

Kurt paused his actions to arch a brow, "Oh, trust me, Smythe; I'm _very_ right in that department."

"Oh?" Sebastian asked as he casually approached him and slid his hands onto Kurt's hips and pulled him close, "Care to test that theory?"

"I want to," he replied honestly, "but I don't feel like dealing with the awkward crap tomorrow."

Sebastian grinned with a soft chuckle, "Cute," he muttered as he brought his hand up to gently rub the back of Kurt's neck, "and this is coming from the guy who literally straddled me in a bar and basically gave me a lap dance as he made out with me just to get some weirdo drunk guy to move?"

Kurt raised his brow and nonchalantly said, "Don't say it like you weren't enjoying it; I was the one sitting in your lap, remember?"

Sebastian scoffed, "If you call that 'sitting', then I'm _definitely_ sleeping in the bed tonight." After Kurt laughed, Sebastian looked him over with a smile and got under the covers, gesturing for Kurt to follow as he laid down and pulled the covers back over himself.

Kurt eyed him curiously as he arched a brow, then turned to the drawer beside him and pulled out a couple pairs of pajama bottoms, tossing one of them to Sebastian. He sat up from the bed and turned around to take his pants off as Kurt turned the other way and followed suit before he got into the bed.

As the two settled down into the bed, Sebastian slid up behind Kurt and wrapped his arm around his waist, pulling him in closer. Kurt raised his head from the pillow to look back at Sebastian, "What are you doing?"

"You've never been the type for drunken hook-ups, so why start now?" he replied into the back of his neck, "Even though you have your friends around you, even though you've got your family and your son, you feel awful lonely in your bed." When Kurt hm'd in agreement, he continued, "That's why other people sleep around; they've either given up on relationships because too many have failed, or they just don't care-- either way, they don't want to go to bed alone, either."

"You're awfully philosophical when you're drunk," Kurt mused.

"And you've still got Gay Face," he quipped in light response.

"Sebas'ian?" Kurt muttered, "thanks."

"Mmhmm," he mumbled back in a muffled tone "go to sleep."

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

_"Hudson, hold up." Kurt demanded as he reached out to gently grab his son's wrist before it turned the doorknob. He smiled sadly at his son and said, "I know it feels weird, but unless Papa says otherwise, it's only polite to knock, buddy."_

_Hudson fixed his face into a grimace as he reached up and knocked on the door with a pouted out lip, then opened the door and marched inside. Kurt rolled his eyes, shaking his head before he looked upward and muttered, "I should have expected that, naming him after you." He chuckled at his son's apparent sarcasm as he followed him inside._

_"You still haven't told him?" He heard as he followed Hudson toward the living room. The polite smile fell from his face as he rounded the corner and saw Blaine sitting on the couch with Chandler. Was that his hand on Blaine's lap?_

_Hudson ran around the couch and hugged Blaine, ignoring Chandler as he said proudly "Hey, Papa; I knocked!"_

_Blaine instinctively hugged his son back before his eyes grew in horror and he pulled away to twist on the couch and lock eyes with Kurt. He glanced over at Chandler before he said, "Kurt, I--"_

_"Don't worry about it," he replied quietly as he averted Blaine's gaze and gestured to the front door, "I'll give you two a few minutes." He didn't give Blaine a chance to respond as he exited the house and fell back against the wall. His face reddened as tears ran down his face, his arms instinctively wrapping around his torso._

_Of course he would pick Chandler. The guy was practically begging for someone he could worship and Blaine always denied it, but it was no secret that he loved the spotlight when he was a Warbler. His sobs turned into a scoff as he shook his head and said to himself, "Pull yourself together, Kurt. It was only a matter of time before he moved on to someone else. This shouldn't be a surprise to you. Besides, it's none of your business anymore."_

_But if he was right, then why was he still crying?_

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


	4. Bring Me To Life

_"Kurt?"_

_"Wake up, Kurt..."_

Kurt's eyes shot open as his entire body jolted with the sudden return to consciousness. He clenched his eyes back shut in embarrassment as he reached up to pinch the bridge of his nose, unwilling to accept the fact that he'd had another episode...with Sebastian Smythe right next to him.

With a soft scoff, he tilted his head to check the digital clock on the bedside table, momentary relief flooding him when he saw that it was only 4:45AM. Maybe he'd be lucky and Sebastian would be too half asleep to remember any of this?

"Are you alright?" Sebastian asked, fully awake.

Of course he wouldn't be that lucky; he couldn't.

If he was, then he'd still be married. He was pulled back to reality from his thoughts when Sebastian gently poked his hip and rolled over to face the inquirer. He nestled deeper into the covers, effectively cuddling into Sebastian's chest before he froze, "Uh...this...isn't going to leave this room...is it?"

Sebastian chuckled softly as he reached his arm around to rub gentle circles into Kurt's back, "Considering I'm the one who was kissing the back of your neck earlier, your secrets are safe with me." He smiled as he leaned in closer to Kurt's face, "I'm Mr. Nice Guy now, remember?"

Kurt couldn't help returning his smile, deciding to just file this whole night away under the 'Drunken Stupor' category for now and let himself enjoy the now almost foreign closeness of another body next to him. He traced light circles into Sebastian's pectoral with his index finger as he spoke, "The day Hudson and I left to go to my Dad's, we stopped by the house so he could say goodbye to Blaine. He couldn't grasp the concept of knocking--still hasn't, really-- and when I followed him in... I, uh, heh... I saw Blaine...with another guy."

He pretended to ignore the slighter tightening of Sebastian's embrace as he gently shook his head and continued, "I know it's silly to be upset about it. I shouldn't have been surprised, really, but...it stung, a bit. It's stupid, I know."

"Not stupid," Sebastian whispered, "human. You guys are divorced, Kurt, after ten _years_ of marriage, okay? I can't imagine the kind of personal hell you've been going through, but I can understand. It's never easy seeing somebody else hold the heart that once belonged only to you." He reached up to give Kurt's arm a gentle squeeze, "But you know it's not bad for the two of you to move on, right?"

"No, no," Kurt chuckled nervously with a shake of his head, "of course it's alright. I could never expect him to just stay single because of--because of..."

"Your son?" Sebastian offered. When Kurt nodded, he sighed sympathetically, "If you think your son would want either of his fathers to be lonely just because of him, then you're more foolish than I ever thought you could be, Hummel."

Kurt's brow furrowed, "What the hell are you talking about, Smythe?"

Sebastian scoffed softly, "Do you know what a kid's first instinct is when their parents get divorced?"

"That it's their fault," Kurt answered with a nod before he shook his head, "But I've already told Hudson before that none of this is his fault."

"And you really expect that to be the end-all, be-all? Just, -poof- bye, bye, blame?" Sebastian gently shook him, "Kurt, no matter what you say or do, he will always suspect that he was part of the reason--at least a little. Do you really want to add your loneliness onto the blame pile?"

"And how do you know so much about this, Sebastian? Besides, you don't know my son."

"I don't need to know him to know what he's thinking," Sebastian sighed heavily as he ran a hand through his hair, "My parents went through a rather nasty divorce a couple of years back. I mean, they were always unhappy with each other, constantly fighting, but I still thought, 'What if I was a better son? What if I...turned over my new leaf too late?'"

Kurt felt a tear run down his cheek and turned his head to avoid it touching Sebastian before he leaned up to give him a gentle peck on the cheek. Hell, it didn't get more intimate than cuddling together in a bed while confessing your innermost insecurities at 4:30 in the morning; what was a little peck added onto it? He bit his bottom lip before he finally said, "I'm sorry; you're right. I need to let myself be happy again. How can I expect my son to be if I can't even set a fine example for him?"

"He's happy, Kurt. Believe me, he's happy. He'll just be happier if you're happy with him." He planted a gentle kiss on Kurt's forehead, "You're not Kurt Anderson-Hummel or whatever anymore. Leave him in the past with Blaine and let Kurt Hummel come back to life."

Kurt studied Sebastian's features, focusing on his green eyes more than anything else, searching for any sign of sarcasm. After a moment of quiet contemplation, he exhaled softly through his nose and offered a soft smile, "You really have changed."

Sebastian chuckled softly, "Don't get too attached to it, Hummel. I'm still me; I'm just not malicious anymore." His smile slightly faltered as he hesitated before continuing, "Kurt, I... I don't know how to say this. I...have an offer."

Kurt's eyebrows immediately rose as he backed away, "I'm not having sex with you, Smythe."

Sebastian laughed and shook his head, "Didn't we already establish that wasn't my intent? No, I can see how lonely you are, Kurt, and I bet I know why. None of your friends have really gone through a divorce yet, except for your creepy glee club coach."

"Mr. Schue is not creepy!" Kurt paused in contemplation, "Okay, so maybe it was a little creepy when we were still in high school, but we're all adults now! Besides, I wouldn't want to bother him when he's so happy raising babies with Ms. Pillsbury."

"Whatever," he replied with a shrug, "my point is that none of your friends can really relate to a divorce, right? Well, if you ever need to...feel close with somebody and vent, I will be more than happy to oblige."

"Why?"

"Because your friends may be trying to help you move on, but none of them will be willing to pull you as far as I will. You deserve to be happy, Kurt Hummel, and I am determined to make sure you are."

"Yes...but why?" Kurt insisted, "Why do you feel so invested in this?"

"You really have no idea?" When Kurt shook his head with a lost expression he continued, "You have such a large group of friends and somehow you inspire an insane amount of loyalty from them. I've been here for almost two years now and I don't know a single person that I could really trust." He gently poked Kurt in the chest, "So, you see, you're not the only one who's lonely."

After a beat, Sebastian snaked his arm around Kurt's waist and pulled him a little closer, "We should get back to sleep. The sun'll be up in a couple hours."

Kurt hm'd, "I probably won't be able to get back to sleep anyway." He scrunched his eyebrows, "Oh, I never should have drank."

Sebastian smirked, "Hangover's already setting in, huh?"

Kurt shook his head, "No, not yet; but I'm sure it will as soon as my son wakes up. That's usually the way this parenting thing works; that's why parents, as a rule, don't typically go out and drown themselves in alcohol."

Sebastian chuckled lightly, "Maybe, but you needed it. Why don't you let Rachel take care of him for a little while?"

"Because she already took care of him for the 'little while' I was at Lynx; that was the deal. Her and Jesse are helping me out, but Hudson is _my_ son which means he's _my_ responsibility."

"Of course," Sebastian uttered softly, "but it's your friends' responsibility to help _you_. Get some sleep, Hummel. I'm sure Berry and St. Elmo won't let your son starve."

Kurt chuckled into his pillow, "You think it's that easy, huh?"

"Who says it can't be?" Sebastian countered with a sigh. He spared Kurt another glance before he rolled over and closed his eyes, leaving the conversation to be continued at a more natural time.

 

_"No, see, you can't hesitate otherwise you'll end up with a gutted pancake."_

_"Gutted--what? Look, mister, I'm pretty sure I know how to flip a pancake. I've watched my daddy do it for years. Not to mention my Auntie Rachel, Auntie 'Tana, Grandma...Gee, a lot of people I know seem to be addicted to pancakes."_

Kurt smiled into his pillow as he started to wake up more. He kept his eyes closed as he stretched, allowing himself a few more precious moments of serenity. Hearing his son's continued giggling, his brow furrowed as he realized there was no other source of heat in his bed. Gingerly sliding his hand over until he felt the cool fabric confirmed his suspicions and he finally decided to get up before his son suffered from too much exposure and contracted Smythitis.

"Uh...Mr. Sebastian? I don't think these pancakes are coming out right..." Hudson said in an unsure tone.

"You can drop the 'Mr.', buddy," Sebastian said calmly before he looked up with an arched brow, "What's wrong?"

"Well...," he started as he turned around to hold up the funky shaped pancake, "aren't pancakes supposed to be round?"

Sebastian chuckled, "The shape doesn't matter as long as it still tastes good."

Hudson screwed his face into a grimace, "But my Daddy always makes them round. My Papa used to say he'd have a 'ameurism' if he couldn't make them perfect circles."

Crap. Of course Kurt Hummel would be a perfectionist about something as trivial as pancakes and he'd clearly passed it down to his son. How was he going to explain this? Why did he even think this would be a good idea? He doesn't do kids; he's still practically a kid in adult clothes.

"Well..." Sebastian chuckled to stall another moment until the idea hit him, "you see, your dad wants them to be round so you'll be a well-rounded individual."

"Uh...huh..." Hudson replied skeptically, "So, what are these for? To make me an outcast of society?"

Sebastian had to bite back his laugh, "No, those...are... to make sure you don't go along with what everyone else does just because everyone else is doing it." Good job, Sebastian. Make the kid think pancakes have magical properties.

"So, if pancakes can do that just by their shape..." the boy bit his bottom look contemplatively then continued, "then can you make me one in the shape of a lightning bolt?"

Sebastian furrowed his brow as he flipped the pancake over, "A lightning bolt? So you can be Harry Potter?" Yep, definitely Blaine's, too.

Much to his surprise, the boy shook his head, "No, I was thinking more like the Flash. He's super smart and really fast! I'd get the high score on Skeeball in no time!"

Sebastian bit back the smile threatening to overtake his features. How would he explain himself out of this situation? What was he supposed to do? He can't give the kid a lightning-shaped pancake because then he'd be disappointed that he didn't get any Flash-y powers. At the same time, if he didn't then he'd have to face the second generation of Kurt Hummel's Resting Bitch Face. 

Crap.

"Sorry, Huds, but no Flash-cakes today," Kurt said as he entered the kitchen, thank God. Sebastian watched as he crouched down in front of his son and ruffled his hair with a soft smile, "I'd never be able to pull you out of the ball pit at Chuck E Cheese if you had super speed; nice try, though." 

Hudson frowned, "So, I can be well-rounded and not do what everyone else does...but I can't be super fast?"

"With great power comes great responsibility," Sebastian tried with uncertainty.

Hudson shot him a glare, "That's Spider-Man."

"And no truer words have ever been spoken," Kurt said, "Huds, you don't need pancakes to be special or to be a hero. There is so much potential in you..." He pursed his lips before he brushed some of his son's hair from his face, "The only way to be good is to do good. Remember that and you'll be just as heroic as the Flash--always." He shot Sebastian a look before he smiled and stood back up, "Now, if the two of you will excuse me, I'm going to go chase this hangover away with a hot, steamy cup of coffee."

Hudson watched his dad make a cup of coffee and leave the kitchen before he turned around to find a small plate with a lightning bolt shaped pancake on it. He gasped silently as he looked up at Sebastian, who simply smirked and held his index finger up to his lips, winking before he returned to making more pancakes.

He didn't want to admit it to himself, but he actually _liked_ making this kid happy.

Shit.


	5. The Time Auntie Snixxx and Mr. Sebastian Babysat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm pretty sure the chapter title says enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys! Sorry for how long it's been since I updated! 3 months, whew! I was writing this story on the side while I focused on another, but the other has enough written to allow myself some time to return to this one.
> 
> I've never written a Glee fic before, and I'm afraid I've made Sebastian a little too nice. So, this chapter is my little test for myself to see if I can handle the task of writing him. But don't worry, it also serves the story! So it's not a fun little one-off.
> 
> This chapter was supposed to be funny, but it started to write itself and sort of turned into a little insight deal. Santana can mature too, right?

For the past month, Sebastian had been doing everything he could to get Kurt out of his shell. They'd gone to Lynxxx almost every Saturday, walks in the park to see various performers and artists, even a few Broadway shows, but nothing seemed to be triggering the inner diva that Sebastian had no doubt still lived within Kurt. Every time they saw each other, he tried to coax Kurt into singing something, at least a "Happy Birthday" to a random kid at the park, but the other man was having none of it.

So, he figured maybe he was approaching it the wrong way. Perhaps he had been too abrasive? Maybe Kurt Hummel needed a more...gleeful approach to be coaxed out. Which is why he offered to babysit Hudson while Kurt went out to Lynxxx with Rachel and Jesse. He even offered the married couple money to support their night out so long as they swore not to hog the karaoke mic for themselves. The purpose of this was to bombard Kurt with the desire to sing after all. 

He knew how silly it sounded; why did it matter if Kurt hadn't been singing? Why did it matter so much to him to get Kurt to sing again? The answer was rather simple, really. If he could reignite Kurt's love for performing, then sooner or later the rest of his zest for life would return. All he needed was a little spark; something to remind Kurt of who he was before Blaine Anderson ever came into the picture.

And that's why he was sitting in the St. James' living room watching Hudson zoom around with a red bathtowel tied around his neck like a cape. It was really simple-- show the kid some attention, feed him, keep him from breaking a bone or dying, then put him to bed. 

He'd been successful until he reached the 'put him to bed' part.

Sebastian groaned inwardly as he fell back into the couch and ran his hands through his hair, silently wishing he'd thought his plan out more thoroughly. How in the hell did he think he could handle babysitting a six year old kid? 

How in the hell did _Kurt_ think he could handle it?

Clearly, they both had overestimated somewhere.

 _Knock Knock_

"I'll get it!" Hudson yelled heroically before he threw his arms out and pretended to fly toward the front door. 

"Hudson, wait!" Sebastain said as he shot off the couch and chased after the kid. He didn't get far down the hallway before the door opened and Satan walked in.

"Well, well...well," Santana smugly crooned at Sebastian as she slowly closed the door behind her. "You've only been at this, what, two hours and already you're letting him answer the door for strangers?"

Sebastian rolled his eyes as he leaned against the wall, "And nobody's stranger than you, are they?"

Santana cocked her brow, "Really, Smythe? _That's_ your brilliant comeback?"

He shrugged before jerking his head toward Hudson, "I don't want to spoil his innocence." He cleared his throat, "Hey, Hudson? Why don't you go pick out a movie?"

Santana smirked as Hudson 'flew' out of the room while she stepped closer to Sebastian, "Alright, Craigslist, let Auntie Snixxx break this all down for you, k? That is a child-- a miniature human boy and Lady Hummel will literally rip your head off and punt it into the neighboring county if he finds out how careless you apparently are. I know this may be a little difficult, with old age and all--"

"We're the same age," Sebastian countered.

"--But kids are fast," she continued as if he hadn't said anything, "and you have to be faster. Now, I don't know what your preferences for positions are, but in case you spent your good years power bottoming for the better portion of the tri-state area, might I suggest stapling your ass cheeks together or finally releasing all of those sleazy loads you've been holding in? Whatever you have to do, do it because Kurt doesn't deserve a messed up child and I'm pretty sure one evening with you is all it would take. "

Sebastian rolled his eyes with a smirk, "Someone seems pretty content on their high horse."

"Please, Smythe. We all know you've taken more loads than a laundromat," Santana quipped noncomittaly before she removed her purse from her shoulder and hung it up on the coatrack. "This is Lady Hummel's kid we're talking about here and he left him with you, _alone_."

"Which means if his father thinks I'm capable of handling him, then you have no right to--"

Santana interrupted him with a slap to the face before pointing an accusatory finger at him, "Drop the damn act, Sebastard, because I know exactly what you're doing. If you think I'm going to let you use that boy to get into Kurt's pants--"

"Who said anything about getting into Kurt's pants, Lopez? Did you even _talk_ to Berry before you came over here? I'm trying to help him, you know?" Sebastian rolled his eyes with a sigh, "Look, I've spent the past hour and a half trying to get that kid to settle down and into bed, so unless you care to be helpful in any capacity, you need to go."

Santana's eyes narrowed in scrutiny as she examined his features before she straightened her posture and muttered, "You've actually been trying to do this whole thing right, haven't you?"

Sebastian squinted, "What?"

"This-- watching Hudson. You actually put some effort into this; he'll be impressed."

"Really?" he replied with a hint of hopefulness in his voice.

Santana nodded, "Mmhmm. And because of that, I'll help you out." She smiled before stepping past him and into the living room, "Alright, Superboy; how about you fly upstairs and meet Auntie Snixxx in the bathroom so we can get you cleaned up and ready for bed."

Hudson paused, "But Aunt 'Tana..."

Santana arched a brow, "Don't Aunt 'Tana me, Huds. It's past your bedtime; your dad will be furious."

Hudson frowned as he stomped to the bottom of the stairs, "It's not fair..."

"Hey," Santana called as she turned to face him, "who's the Queen of Bitchfits?"

Hudson pouted, "Auntie Snixxx..."

"Which means?"

Hudson sighed overdramatically before reciting from memory, "Which means my feeble munchkin fits are no match for yours."

Santana smiled proudly, "That's my boy. Bathroom-- now." Before she followed him up the stairs she turned to Sebastian and said, "And that's how you do that."

"I'm pretty sure Kurt wouldn't approve of the word 'bitchfit'."

She rolled her eyes, "Bite me, Smythe."

"Not even if you had a thirteen incher, Lopez."

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------

 

An hour later, the two of them were sitting on the couch watching some lame cooking show because it was the only thing on that had any semblance to entertainment. The two silently berated themselves for being so uncharacteristically boring and domestic, but the desire to _not_ interact with each other was too strong to ignore.

After the monotoned woman explained how to 'properly' baste a stack of ribs, Sebastian threw his head back with a groan, "God, I need alcohol!"

Santana smirked as she rested her head against her hand and lazily twirled a lock of hair around her finger, "Yeah, me, too. I think I'll go raid St. Berry's liquor cabinet." She stood up and paused, "Of course, it's probably just full of wine coolers, knowing her lame ass."

Sebastian's eyes followed her as she walked away, "Grab me one, will you?"

"Ha!" Santana chuckled as she paused in the doorway, "Tonight you're designated babysitter, Smythe, which means no booze for you."

"Damn it..." Sebastian groaned, "Why the hell did I volunteer for this anyway?"

"Funny you should mention that, because I was just wondering the same thing," Santana smiled as she re-entered the room with two bottles of Green Apple Smirnoff Ice. 

"Smirnoff?" Sebastian questioned with an arched brow.

"Berry's getting adventurous," she replied sarcastically with a shrug. "Alright, Prep School; spill it. If you're not doing it to get into Lady Hummel's pants, then why did you decide to be so helpful?"

Sebastian sighed, "Well... I mean I'm not really sure. I've been taking him out, trying to coax him into letting loose--"

"Oh, he's been letting loose," Santana quipped. "That man's developed a love for daiquiris."

Sebastian shook his head, "Kurt used to be so full of life. Yeah, he has always been more mature than most of us, but...his eyes have lost that spark. Blaine was never good at sharing the spotlight and I guess the darkness around the spotlight was so cold, it killed the spark." He smiled sadly, "I want him to get it back. And I want to help him do it."

Santana's eyes narrowed slightly, the two drinks still untouched. She watched his movements, how he was avoiding eye contact, "Are you in love with him?"

Sebastian's face paled as he slowly brought his gaze up to meet Santana's. His eyes darkened slightly as he said in a gravelly voice, "I don't fall in love."

"Oh, come the hell on, Smythe!" Santana groaned as she fell back into her seat, "Don't try to feed me that crap. Why else would you be doing this? Because he needs a friend? Well, he already has plenty of those."

Sebastian shook his head as he stood up and headed toward the door, "I'm leaving. You can stay til Kurt gets back, right?"

"So, you're just going to run?" Santana rolled her eyes as she stood up and followed him, "He trusted you to watch after his child and you're going to run away and dump it on me?"

"He'll be fine."

"Kurt or Hudson? Damn it, Smythe!" She stepped around him and leaned back against the door before she pushed him away, "You walk out this door and you'll be taking all of the hard work you've done with you! Don't you get it? Kurt thought Blaine was his one and only and when that hobbit asked for a divorce, he felt betrayed. Except for the rest of former New Directions, he hasn't been able to trust anyone. Then you come along and he trusts you with his child."

Sebastian rolled his eyes, "Then I guess it's a good thing he's got you guys to see him through."

"And now he has you, Sebastian." Santana pursed her lips, "So are you going to run like a coward or stay and be the kind of man Kurt needs? You've reached him in ways the rest of us have spent the past year wishing we could. You don't have to figure out what feelings you may or may not have for him tonight or tomorrow...but you can't just walk out on him."

"And what if I'm not what he needs? What if I'm toxic?" There, he'd finally said it. He had finally voiced the fear that had been haunting him since he took on this 'mission'.

The two held a minor stare off, neither one sure of what to say, until Hudson spoke sleepily from behind them, "Mr. Sebastian? Could you come check for monsters? I had a bad dream..."

Santana cocked a brow before she softly said, "I guess you have your answer. Now you have _two_ Hummels that need you, that trust you. Don't toss it away out of a silly fear. Just bring my friend back, bring that kid his father back...and let the rest come what may."

She turned to open the door before she nodded toward Hudson, her eyes still on Sebastian's, "Hakuna Matata, right? Isn't that the song of your people?"

Sebastian clenched his jaw as he watched her leave before he sighed and turned to face Hudson. He headed toward the stairs before picking the boy up and said, "Let's go scare away those monsters."


	6. This Is What It Takes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I wanted to thank you guys for taking the time to comment and give me some feedback. I hadn't put this story as my main focus until I wrote myself into a corner on the other story I was writing, which is weird considering it was going EXACTLY where I planned it, haha.
> 
> But anyways, my love for Kurtbastian has been awoken, no longer dormant. Our babies need some love now. Gosh, I can't wait to get past the divorce angst; this is killing me! On that note, this is the second to the last chapter before the divorce stops weighing so heavily on Kurt. I'm all for natural progression, but I can only handle writing something I have no experience in for so long haha. If you don't like that, I apologize.
> 
> Now, I know we've all had almost two years to grieve for our beloved quarterback but as a precaution there is a wee bit of a conversation about him. Nothing too sad, but just in case that topic is sensitive for you...well, now you know.
> 
> This chapter contains lyrics to "This Is What It Takes" by Shawn Mendes. 
> 
> And on a final note, this chapter also contains the return of a character I've promised since the beginning! Yay!

When Kurt entered the house with Rachel and Jesse later on, he had a line of apologies ready for Sebastian. They hadn't specified a time to expect him back, but he also didn't want the former Warbler to think that he expected him to keep watch all night, even if it was said former Warbler's idea to go out in the first place. That's why his brow arched when he realized all of the lights downstairs were shut off, save for one lamp in the living room.

"Oh my God, did that asshole leave Hudson here _alone_?!" Rachel asked incredulously as she approached Kurt's side to inspect her living room, a hand places on her chest in typical Rachel Berry fashion. Jesse had already run upstairs to check Hudson's room.

Kurt rolled his eyes softly with a shrug, "I know he threw a rock slushie in my ex's eye, but I doubt he's that horrible. He's probably passed out on my bed."

"Oh, it's better than that," Jesse said softly through a chuckle as he came back downstairs. He gestured with his thumb as he looked to Kurt, "There's a Kodak moment waiting for you in Hudson's room."

Kurt's eyes widened as he started for the stairs, "Oh my God. Please tell me my son didn't talk him into playing Indiana Jones..."

Rachel's brow furrowed, "Wait, Indiana Jones?" Her eyes widened in concern as she started to inspect her house for any damage, "I'm not going to find a large boulder in my kitchen am I?"

Kurt shook his head as he stopped at the bottom of the stairs next to Jesse, "Calm down, Rachel. A while back I had Sam babysit Hudson and when Blaine and I came home he was tied to a chair gagged with one of Blaine's bowties. I still haven't figured out how he reached them..." His voice trailed off as he turned to Jesse, "He's not tied up, is he?"

Jesse snickered and shook his head, "No, way better."

Kurt whimpered before he sprinted up the stairs and hurried toward Hudson's bedroom. He paused at the doorway, closing his eyes briefly to wish it wasn't bad before he lightly pushed the door open and smiled.

Everything was fine. Hudson was curled up on the big guest bed, his head resting on Sebastian's stomach as a pool of drool soaked into the older man's shirt as he slept soundly. Sebastian was also asleep, one arm under Hudson and the other draped over the side of the bed, an open book laying on the floor just under his hand.

Jesse was right; perfect Kodak moment. And he finally understood why he was laughing-- who wouldn't laugh at seeing Sebastian passed out with a six year old on the bed after a few hours of babysitting? He slowly crept forward, doing his best not to wake his son as he gently shook Sebastian's shoulder.

"Sebastian?" he whispered into his ear, "Bas..."

Sebastian groaned softly as he woke up, squinting his eyes tiredly before he turned his head to Kurt, "Hey..." he croaked.

Kurt smiled, "Hey...rough night?" 

"Hm?" Sebastian questioned before he looked at Hudson, "Oh, no. He had a nightmare and asked me to--"

"To make sure the monsters were gone? Needn't say more." Kurt smiled knowingly, "Why don't you disentangle from my son and you can take my bed?"

Sebastian shook his head, "You don't have to give me your bed, Kurt. We've shared it before."

"I know. I just wasn't sure if you were up for it." He winced at his wording, knowing that Sebastian had some wise retort inside hidden beneath his weariness. He sighed silently in relief before he grabbed Sebastian's hand and led him out of the room.

Both men woke up the next morning, one refreshed and the other fighting off the remnants of a hangover. Kurt had sobered up for the most part by the time he got home, but his head was killing him.

"Oh, I need a Tylenol," he groaned quietly as he pinched his forehead while Sebastian stirred behind him.

"Oof, me too," Sebastian agreed as he turned in the bed. "My back is killing me."

Kurt chuckled as the memories from last night came flooding back, "Yeah, you and Hudson looked rather cozy." His smile faded slightly as he remembered that today was the day.

The. Day.

"Are you okay?" Sebastian asked as he propped himself up on his elbows. His green eyes narrowed in concern toward Kurt, "Did something happen last night?"

"I'm? Oh, no..." Kurt replied with a gentle head shake. "It's just...if you see Rachel today, tread carefully. It's...Finn's anniversary."

The way Kurt spoke his name, laced with solemn acceptance and sadness, almost like eternal mourning, was like a razor digging into Sebastian's chest. He wasn't exactly an expert in these kind of situations, not really having anyone he knew lose someone they cared so much about. 

"I'm sorry, Kurt. I'm, uh... Do you, maybe...want to talk about it? I mean, would it help?"

Kurt sighed as he rolled over to face him and offered a sad smile, "Have you ever lost a loved one, Sebastian? Not a relative you hardly knew, but someone you had an actual bond with?" When he shook his head Kurt continued, "Right."

Kurt sat up with a hint of a grint before he spoke again, "You know how they say it gets better with time? Well, it's a lie. It doesn't get better, it doesn't get easier-- not exactly. It's like...a hole and you try to fill it back up with things, distractions...but it's all quicksand. Eventually, sometime down the line, everything sinks and...you remember. Something exciting will happen or you'll see something that reminds you of them and your instinct will be to call. Then you remember that they're gone...they're out of range."

He paused to pick at the fabric on the blanket, "When we decided to have a child, Blaine and I decided we wanted to name it after our best friends. If it was a girl, she would have been named after Rachel and Tina. If it was a boy, then he would have been named after Sam and--"

"Finn," Sebastian finished quietly.

"Yeah," Kurt smiled fondly, "and when we found out it was a boy, we had to decide the order of their names. Blaine said Finn's name was always first in his mind, but I knew I couldn't go on with my sanity intact if I had to say his name everyday for another eighteen plus years. I... I felt like it'd be torture for me...saying his name but speaking to a little boy instead of my big brother."

"That's why you named him Hudson," Sebastian supplied, his voice cracking from getting choked up.

"Mm," Kurt replied as a tear rolled down his face. He sniffled before he shook his head, "I felt terrible for the longest time before I realized Finn would have been happy if I named the kid Grilled Cheezus in his honor." He chuckled when he saw the Sebastian's lost expression, "It's an inside joke.

Sebastian smirked at the little smile that Kurt adorned, the slightest hint of a twinkle in his eyes. He would never admit it out loud, but he vowed from that moment on to do everything in his power to see that look again. He cleared his throat and said, "So how do you cope? With the anniversary, I mean?"

"I just go about my day, I guess. I call my dad and check on Carole in the middle of the day, but I've stopped missing him as badly as I did before."

"How come?"

Kurt shrugged, "I talk to him all the time. I miss him a lot, but talking to him just makes me miss him a little less. Most of the time I just wish he could respond." He screwed his face as he gauged Sebastian's reaction, "You think I'm nuts, don't you?"

"No," he replied shaking his head. "I think it's normal." Damn it, he wanted to kiss him so badly. No, he had to get a grip. Help Kurt find himself again, then deal with the feelings. But what if he found himself and was afraid to lose himself again with another person? What if the horrible things he's done means Kurt wouldn't want to give him a chance anyways?

"How about some coffee?" Kurt asked brightly as he got out of bed.

Sebastian's eyes followed him before he smiled, "Sounds great."

"Great! Well, I'll go get it started while you get dressed then I can tell you how last night went! I met this gorgeous guy. Oh! So. Freaking. Pretty."

Sebastian sighed heavily as he threw the covers back while Kurt went downstairs. His eyes remained on the doorway as he said, "Great. Good going, Sebastian. Freaking dumbass."

"Good morning, Kurt," Rachel greeted softly from the small table as he entered the kitchen. She offered a soft smile when she saw a flash of cautious trepidation cross his features, "If that look is because of today, I'm fine. Well, not in the strictest sense, but at least I can reminisce without losing my cool." She looked down at her coffee mug as she thumbed the rim of it, "Jesse's helped me a lot."

"He's certainly different from the annoyingly selfish teen we used to know and loathe, huh?" Kurt chuckled as he poured himself a mug of coffee before joining her at the table.

"Speaking of major character changes," she said with a gentle hair flip, "how about Sebastian?"

Kurt shrugged, "What about him?"

Rachel squealed knowingly, "Don't play innocently oblivious with me, Kurt Elizabeth Hummel; I'm a professional Tony Award-winning actress, remember?" She giggled at his eye roll, "No, come on. He's kind, he smiles without mischief behind it, he even paid for our night out and stayed in to watch a six year old. Are you trying to tell me that's the same Sebastian Smythe who rock salt slusheed Blaine?"

"Of course not," Kurt replied. "But he is the same one who got the Warblers to perform 'Stand' at Regionals and collect donations for charity."

"Hm, I don't know, Kurt. I think, maybe, he might like you?"

"What?! Rach, are you on drugs?"

"No, Why would you think that?"

"I don't know. Why would you think Sebastian would be into me? Even if I was the type he'd find attractive, maturity aside, I doubt he would be remotely interested in being with me."

"Why not? Kurt, you're a total catch!"

"Sure, Rachel; such a catch that I couldn't even keep my marriage intact. Maybe I'm just not worth the trouble."

"How do you know it wasn't just Blaine dropping the ball?" When he didn't respond, she covered his hand with her own and said, "Kurt? It's been a year, sweetie. I know you thought he was your forever, I know you're hurting inside and you blame yourself, but--"

"I know I need to move on, Rach. I mean, hell, Blaine already has." He ran a hand through his hair before he cleared his throat to avoid getting choked up. "Moving on and jumping back into looking for a guy are two different things. I need to be me again."

"You certainly looked like your old self last night when you were pouring your heart and soul into Alanis Morrisette's 'Oughta Know'. It was refreshing, really. A tad flat on a couple of bars; you haven't been singing enough lately."

"Kurt sang last night?" Sebastian asked as he entered the kitchen. He looked at Kurt and smiled, "I'm glad."

"I'm sure you are," Rachel muttered into her mug before she snapped out of it and smiled cheerily. "Hey, I know! Why don't we invite Santana and Brittany over and we can have a mini glee-union?!" She exchanged looks between the two, "Oh, come on! I know Sebastian wasn't one of us but I'm sure he wouldn't mind performing again."

Sebastian raised his eyebrows as both of them turned their gazes toward him. Honestly, he didn't care to join in on rehashing their insane habit of spontaneous musical numbers, but the pleading look on Kurt's face made his decision for him. He knew that he expected him to say no, but he cared more about getting Kurt back to being Kurt than he did preserving his eardrums.

"Sure, why not?"

Rachel squealed happily and clapped her hands together, "This is going to be amazing! I'll send Jesse on a booze run!" She yelled happily as she ran out of the kitchen.

"Yes, please do." Kurt uttered unemphatically as he rubbed his temples, "Why did you have to say yes?"

"Because it'll help you." When Kurt looked at him questioningly he shrugged, "Nice now, remember?"

 

\--------------------------------------

"They're here!" Hudson shrieked excitedly before he ran for the front door and swung it open, "Auntie Snixxx! Auntie Brittany!"

Brittany chuckled as she bent over to give him a hug, "Hey, gayby!"

"Brit, my child is not a gay baby," Kurt said as he approached them with a smile.

"Um, well, both of his dads are gay and he was a baby-- your baby at some point, so technically he is a gay baby."

"Don't bother, Lady Hummel," Santana said as he opened his mouth to speak. "Brit's already set in her ways. So, I heard there was booze?" She asked as she entered the living room, "Well, Sebastian Smythe; funny seeing you here...still."

"Yeah, well," Sebastian gestured toward Kurt, who was busy catching up with Brittany, "Kurt needs to come back so...he's worth it. Even if he doesn't think so."

"Oh my God; I knew you were eavesdropping," Rachel said as she put a hand to her chest.

Sebastian shrugged, "More like overhearing because I didn't want to interrupt your conversation." His green eyes fell on Kurt, "Anderson certainly did a number on him. Even when we were teenagers Kurt seemed confident in himself."

"It was usually a facade-- depending on the situation, anyway." Rachel shook her head and leaned in closer to Sebastian, "So you like him?".

"Ugh, of course he does, hobbit," Santana huffed. "Do you plan on telling him, Mr. Smitten?"

"In a way, yes," Sebastian said with a nod. "I'm more concerned with getting his mojo back first, so it's not exactly telling him I like him. He doesn't need that swimming in his head right now. What he needs is to know that his battle doesn't need to be solitary." He lifted his bottle of beer and took a swig, "After all, every hero needs a sidekick."

"Well, as soon as Jesse comes back with some liquor, we can start," Rachel said.

A few minutes later after they had gathered in the den, Jesse entered with a few bottle of liquor and handed Kurt a separate bag with a knowing smile.

"Not Your Father's Root Beer?!" Kurt gasped excitedly before he hopped off the couch and hugged Jesse, "St James, you are amazing! I take back every rotten thing I ever said about you. I love you. I love you!"

After everyone had gotten some alcohol in them, it came time for karaoke. Rachel covered some Broadway, Sara Bareilles, and Santana and Brittany covered 'Sexy Back'. Sebastian noticed Kurt's melancholy and sighed before he stood up and approached the lonely mic.

"I've heard a few times that your guys' glee club enjoyed expressing things through music. So...I'd like to give it a shot." He cleared his throat and looked Kurt in the eye, "I hope it inspires someone."

He grabbed the acoustic guitar that they had placed on the edge of the stage and started strumming some chores before he closed his eyes and started singing.

_"I watch your troubled eyes as you rest,_  
And I fall in love with every breath.  
Wonder if those eyes are really shut,  
And am I the one you're dreaming of? 

_'Cause underneath the darkness_  
There's a light that's trying so hard to be seen.  
And I know this 'cause I've noticed  
A little bit shining through the seams. 

_And if this is what it takes,_  
Then let me be the one to bare the pain.  
Ooh if this is what it takes  
I'll break down these walls that are in our way,  
If this is what it takes." 

He fought the urge to start shaking as he picked up the rhythm to build up to the bridge. He opened his eyes, bravely looking into Kurt's, and silently vowed not to look away until the song was finished.

_"Cause if you don't understand yet_  
Then I'll never let you forget  
That you don't have to do this on your own. 

_I'll be your shoulder to lean on._  
I'll be your right when you feel wrong.  
So come on, take my hand, we're moving on. 

_And if this is what it takes,_  
Then let me be the one to bare the pain.  
Ooh and if this is what it takes,  
Then I'll break down these walls,  
These walls that are in our way.  
If this is what it takes." 

He strummed the last chord, the room falling under a deafening silence. Of course no one else's reactions mattered except for Kurt's.

Kurt, who was shaking visibly as he stated at Sebastian with tear-filled eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh oh! It seems Sebby has struck a chord! And we have a cliffhanger! Sorry, guys, but I had to turn evil some time. 
> 
> Also, I was not paid to advertise Not Your Father's Root Beer. However, if you are old enough to drink, I highly recommend it. Very tasty stuff. Yeah, I kind of Mary Sue'd my love for it into Kurt. Oops.


	7. The Thunderdome of Feels

Kurt and Sebastian continued their stare-off. Sebastian could see a mix of surprise and...was that fear in his eyes? Yeah, he could definitely relate to that. He licked his bottom lip nervously, trying to find the right thing to say but Kurt quickly walked out toward the kitchen before any words could come out.

Sebastian jumped off the stage and strode after Kurt, ignoring Rachel's critique of his performance. When he entered the kitchen he found Kurt with his hands resting against the counter, his head bowed and arms shaking. He mentally kicked himself for what he'd just done before he cleared this throat, 

"Kurt?"

"No," Kurt shakily said. He shook his head as if he were fighting thoughts. "I don't know what that was...but...no."

Sebastian's heart sank, "Kurt... I wasn't--"

"What?" Kurt turned to face Sebastian with red rimmed eyes, "What weren't you doing, huh? Is this the part where you tell me it's not what it looks like? Because it sure as hell looks to me like you were singing your feelings."

Sebastian's eyes narrowed, "And you don't approve?"

Kurt scoffed incredulously, "I'm getting divorced, Sebastian."

"Not getting," he replied with a shake of his head. "Are. You are already divorced, Kurt; it's been a year. I didn't do that so we could banter or--or argue about it." He stepped closer to Kurt, "Now, I'm not going to deny what I just did. You're right; I was...embracing the New Directions approach to situations...but I wasn't doing it expecting you to run into my arms and start an epic love story."

"Then why did you do it?"

Sebastian sighed heavily, fighting his guy instinct to run before he expressed himself any more than he already had in the past twenty-four hours. But he couldn't run; he wouldn't...not anymore.

"When I ran into you at the bar a month ago... I couldn't believe my eyes. Even when I had thrown so much crap at you, you never sunk in and let yourself be defeated. But that night? I wasn't looking at Kurt Hummel...I was looking at a shell. Now, you have every right to feel like crap because of the hell you've gone through, but I wasn't going to just sit by and watch you do it. That might when we came back here you cried in your sleep and after we talked, I vowed to myself that I would try my damnedest to bring Kurt Hummel back...whatever it takes."

"That's why you have Rachel and Jesse money to go out last night?" Kurt asked as he crossed his arms. "And why you agreed to this party? You thought Glee fever could 'cure' me?"

"There's nothing to cure; you're not diseased, but yeah. I thought if you could remember how you used to be it might reignite your spark."

"And the song? If you weren't expecting...romance then what was it?"

Sebastian sat down in a chair, "Last night, Santana came by. It didn't take her long to figure out that I was falling for you. She figured out why I was doing everything and I tried to run. That song got everything across, Kurt. It summed it up so perfectly. I'm not foolish enough to say I love you so quickly, but I've already fallen for you. However, I know the last thing you need right now is a boyfriend." He finally drew the courage to lift his green eyes and stare into Kurt's, "I just want to help you move past it all. I want to help you come back-- no tricks, no seduction, no other ulterior motives. I'll be whatever you need me to be."

Kurt arched a brow before he crossed the room and pulled out a chair to sit in it, "Why did you try to run?"

Sebastian cleared his throat, "I..." Should he tell him? God, Why did they have to have this heart to heart now? Could he at least get some time to prepare? "I didn't want to mess things up. I mean, what if you thought I was the same guy from high school?"

Kurt smiled softly, "If that was the case I never would have let you anywhere near Hudson, let alone my bedroom." He pursed his lips, "So, you have feelings for me...but you're more concerned with helping me move on from my divorce than pursuing a relationship? What if I don't have feelings for you?"

Sebastian shrugged, "There's plenty of time to sort that out and I'll wait however long I have to to hear the answer. I've never done this for anyone before. I've never done the romance thing. Since the Karofsky incident I haven't even... slept with anyone."

Kurt chuckled, "That's quite a dry spell, Smythe." The sarcastic glint in his eyes softened, "So, can we just...push past the akward part of all of this? I have enough of that with Blaine every time I call him to see if he'll take Hudson."

Sebastian's brow furrowed, "He still won't take him?"

Kurt shook his head, "Nope. There's always some excuse. The poor kid asks about him all the time and every time I have to tell him no, it's like I'm shattering his heart."

Sebastian clenched his jaw wishing he could beat the crap out of Blaine. It was one thing to want to avoid your ex, but why avoid your child?

"I know it's not my place, but may I offer some advice?" Kurt shrugged so he continued, "Just drop him. If he's going to keep doing this, then there's no need to continue trying. He's already broken your heart and we all know inside Hudson's hurting. The ball's in his court, Kurt. Blaine needs to make the winning shot, not you or Hudson."

"And what about our kid, Bas? Am I just...supposed to tell him to forget about his father?"

"Of course not, Kurt. You're his father; Blaine's turned himself into a deadbeat so let him do it. It's up to us to get it through to the kid that none of this is his fault."

"Us'?" Kurt asked with a cocked brow.

"Yeah, us," Sebastian replied with a nod. "You, me, Rachel, Jesse, Santana-- all of us." His face contorted into a less confident expression, "Or, you guys. I'm sure I've overstayed my welcome."

"Don't be ridiculous," Kurt said before he stood up and leaned over to wrap his arms around Sebastian. He gave him a peck on the cheek, "You've been such a great friend to me-- more than a great friend, breaching into best friend territory. To be honest, you're the only one who seems to know exactly what I need. Everyone else has tried to give me space, but you? When I need a shoulder to lean on, you're there. When I need a babysitter for my son, you're there. When I need a dose of life, you deliver."

Sebastian smirked coyly, "Careful, Anderson-Hummel; you might start to fall in love with me."

Kurt shook his head, "It's Hummel. Just Hummel." He patted Sebastian's shoulder before he stood back up and looked toward the party, "Should we head back in?"

"Sure," Sebastian replied as he stood. He turned toward Kurt, "But one thing first." He wrapped his arms around Kurt and held him close, burying his nose into Kurt's hair.

Kurt chuckled into Sebastian's shoulder, "My, you have gone soft."

"Hush," he replied with a smirk. 

"Daddy?" Hudson asked from the doorway. When the two turned toward the boy, his blue eyes widened the same time his grin did, "Is Mr. Sebastian my new papa?!"

Kurt heard Sebastian wince in his ear as he smiled at his son. "You should be in bed, Huds."

"I know...but I had a dream about papa. I miss him," Hudson said through a frown.

"I know you do, sweetie. Unfortunately your papa is...well, I'm not sure myself. But...no, Mr. Sebastian isn't your new papa."

"Then what is he?" Hudson asked as he cocked his head to the side.

"Think of me as a big brother," Sebastian offered as he walked over and crouched down in front of him. "I'm the one who chases the scary monsters away, beats up the bully at school who tries to take your lunch money, and helps you--"

"Bas, he's six." Kurt interjected, "You're going to beat up a six year old?"

"No," he replied as he turned his head to smile up at Kurt, "that's when I bribe another six year old bully."

"Great, teach my son how to hire goons to do his dirty work. That'll make him popular," Kurt said with a gentle eye roll.

Sebastian turned back to Hudson, "Did Auntie Rachel's screeching wake you up or was it another nightmare?"

Kurt watched their interaction silently, becoming more impressed by Sebastian with every word he spoke, every action he did. If there was any doubt that Sebastian had changed from the foul ass he used to be, it was quickly becoming non-existent.

He was pulled out of his thoughts when Sebastian offered to go scare the monsters away again. "Oh, I've got it," Kurt said politely before he took Hudson's hand. "Go back to the party. I'll be down in a few."

As Kurt walked upstairs with Hudson, he tried to ignore his son's banter about Mr. Sebastian. In truth he could never really ignore anything that came out of Hudson's mouth, and it was great that he liked Sebastian...but he could easily see where this was headed. Hudson misses his father--his other father, and since Blaine wants nothing to do with him he's starting to get attached to Sebastian.

If Hudson starts to think of Sebastian as his 'new daddy' then it'll only be a matter of time before he has to break his son's heart--again. Sure, there was always the slight probability that he would fall in love with Sebastian--

Wait, what? Wow, that sentence used to be the thing of nightmares. Ok, Kurt, back to the tangent.

If he didn't fall in love with Sebastian, and Hudson grew attached to him as a new father figure, then they would be finding themselves in an entirely new arena of chaos. Like Thunderdome. 

The Thunderdome of Feels.

But Sebastian was also right, very right. Blaine will always be Hudson's father, but if he wanted to choose Chandler over his son then who the hell was he to stand in the man's way? Their son still had plenty of love around him, that love just needed to be enough to make up for it. And he couldn't stay in divorce limbo forever. The last few times he'd gone out, whether with Sebastian or Rachel and Jesse, he felt free...alive again. Why let Blaine suck away their happiness? It wasn't like he was exactly mourning the loss of anything.

What a dick.

"Huds?" Kurt asked as they approached the bedroom door. He turned toward his son and crouched down in front of him. He smiled gently as he brushed some hair from his face, "You know how you've been wanting to go visit papa?"

Hudson's eyes lit up as he nodded, "Yeah!"

Shit. "Right. Well, buddy, the thing is...your papa is...well, he's not really acting like papa right now. He's more concerned with--other things and it's just...not fair to you. I'm sorry, I really wish I could explain this better but I don't even know the whole deal. The point I'm trying to make...is right now, papa has a lot of choices to make."

"Just like us?"

"Yeah, sweetie. Just like us. And right now he isn't necessarily making the best choices so they're keeping him away from being able to see you."

Hudson frowned, "I don't like his choices."

Kurt chuckled softly, "Me neither, Huds. So, until papa starts making those choices, I think it would be better if we just gave him some space. Does that sound okay with you?"

Hudson nodded, "Of course, Daddy. I want papa to be happy, just like you."

Kurt wiped a tear away from his cheek before Hudson noticed it, "Yeah, bud," he said through a cracked voice, "but your happiness is the most important of all because you're my son. Your happiness matters, too, okay?"

Hudson nodded before he leaned over and hugged his dad, "I am happy, Daddy. I still have you, Auntie Rachel, Uncle Jesse, Auntie Snixxx and Brit, and now Mr. Sebastian, too. Oh, and daddy?"

"Yeah?"

Hudson whispered in his ear, "I'm pretty sure Mr. Sebastian wants to kiss you."

Kurt covered his hand as he laughed, "And why's that?"

Hudson shrugged, "He looks at you the same way papa used to." He smiled before he entered his room and looked around, growling softly.

Kurt furrowed his brow, "Huds, what are you doing?"

"Scaring away the monsters," he replied as he continued to growl toward the darkest corners of the bedroom. "Mr. Sebastian taught me. He said my growl's the scariest of them all."

"Did he now?" Kurt leaned against the door frame, "So, you're good to go?" When Hudson nodded, he smiled back and turned to walk away. "Love you, night."

"Love you, night." Hudson repeated from his bed.

Kurt smiled to himself as he walked down the stairs and back to the party. He walked up to Sebastian, downed the drink he offered, and looked back up into his green eyes. 

"To hell with Blaine. Tonight..." Kurt looked around noticing everyone was staring at him. He smirked before turning his attention back to Sebastian, "Tonight, Kurt Hummel makes a comeback." As everyone around them cheered Kurt mouthed the words 'thank you' to Sebastian.

Sebastian winked before he took Kurt's hand and led him over towards the other side of the room, "So, what's the first thing the New Kurt Hummel wants to do?"

"Besides you? Don't look so surprised, Bas; majority of the reason I hated you back then was because I wanted to bang you as much as the next gay guy." Kurt's demeanor slightly vanished, "Sorry. That wasn't fair, was it?"

Sebastian smirked, "I'm okay, Kurt. However, you could always pay me back with a kiss?"

"Like that's any better than what I just said?"

"Blame it on the alcohol," Sebastian shrugs before his smirk morphs into a grin. He gently placed his hands on the sides of Kurt's neck before he kissed him. 

The two continued to kiss for a minute, both of them getting buried further under all of their feelings until it felt like they only ever existed as a kiss. Kurt moaned softly as he brought his arms up around Sebastian's neck and pulled away with a smile.

"I could get used to kissing you."


	8. Moving On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so here we are: Chapter 8! Gosh, what used to be a chore to write has grown a life of its own! First, I want to thank everyone for reviewing. Your feedback is very much appreciated and I love you.
> 
> I'm glad you guys seem to be enjoying the interactions between Sebastian and Hudson, I love writing them, but for the sake of progressing the story, the fact that Kurt would be uncharacteristically neglectful if Hudson stuck around, and we have ourselves at a place where Blaine must return.
> 
> The beginning banter of this chapter is a small tribute to fhartz91. Her stories are ALL amazing, and lots of them are Kinky. Seriously, E.L. James has NOTHING on her! She is my favorite Kurtbastian writer, her stories being what sparked my desire to write my own Kurtbastian story.
> 
> So, I will stop this tangent with a final note, Enjoy Sebastian and Hudson while you still can. Of course the cute little guy will return, though.

"Oh, my God, Kurt! Kurt! Ah! Fuck, that hurt! Shit! Will you-- Kurt, I'm pretty sure that's not where that goes!"

Kurt leaned back on his heels and shot Sebastian a scowl. He pursed his lips, eyebrow quirked before he tilted his head ever slightly, "Are you seriously telling the designer how to do his job?"

Sebastian scoffed slightly, "Well, that depends, because as a designer you sure do seem to be stabbing me a lot with that damn needle." He shook his head as he pulled up the leg of the pants because he was pretty sure Kurt drew blood. "Fuck, if I wanted flagellation I'd have gone to the kink club downtown."

Kurt smirked as he shook his head, "Well, if you weren't such an untrusting wuss and stayed still for longer than five seconds, maybe I wouldn't be stabbing you so many times." He gave a little shrug, "Leave it to Sebastian Smythe to turn pant-fitting into something sexual."

"And what the hell is that supposed to mean, Hummel?"

"Nothing!" Kurt replied in mock defense, "Except that you could have easily alluded being stabbed by a needle to getting a tattoo, but instead you chose a kink club?" He paused his hands on Sebastian's leg to look up at him again, "Wait, you've gone to the kink club down the street?"

Sebastian rolled his eyes, "Why, is this the part where you're going to judge me for it if I have?"

"No," he replied with a head shake. "I'd think it was hot, though...in a rebellious, taboo kind of way." He started to hum happily to himself as he continued working on the pants.

"Kinky sex is only taboo because we choose to view it that way as a society." Sebastian looked down at Kurt and smiled as he pictured him in leather. He shook his head before he got carried away even further. No, Kurt couldn't do s&m. He was far too innocent for that.

"I just don't get it. I mean, Why would you let someone else hurt you?"

"It's not always about the pain, Princess." Sebastian studied the pants and smiled. Kurt definitely knew how to transform old jeans into a hot piece of clothing. "Some couples rule out the pain completely--except for punishments, of course. It's all about control. There are those who like being in control and those who, for a short while, want to hand it over for certain aspects of their life."

"But why? I'm sorry, but I don't understand it."

"Well, it's not for you to understand unless you're a part of it. Being a dominant or submissive is all about being what the other one needs. A dominant is trained by their sub just as much as their sub is trained by them. Why are you so curious about it?" He shot Kurt a cheeky grin, "Do you wanna try it?"

"Not. At. All." Kurt replied as he finished up. "I just...find it helpful to go on a tangent with someone while I'm seeing clothes on them. It helps ward off awkward silence."

"And we have an abundance of that," Sebastian said sarcastically. "Wow...Kurt, this is great."

"Really? You think so?" He asked as he stood up and took a step back.

"Hell yeah." Sebastian turned sideways as he examined himself in the mirror, "My ass looks great in these."

Kurt rolled his eyes as he crossed over to the vanity and dropped the needle onto it. He checked his hair in the mirror, making sure to sneak a few glances because, damn Sebastian's ass did look great in those pants.

"So, can we get started on the blazer now or are you not finished with indulging your narcissism?" Kurt asked as he crossed his arms with a smirk.

"That depends..." Sebastian replied without looking away from the mirror.

"On?" Kurt pressed.

Sebastian looked up from the mirror and smirked, "Do you plan on trying to pierce my nipples while you're at it or actually sewing?"

Kurt sneered at Sebastian's humored chuckling, "I knew I should have gone for the dick shot when I was taking in the crotch."

Sebastian's chuckled died down into a smile as he tilted his head to the side, "If it's any consolation, I am really grateful you took such care with my...boys."

"Hmph," Kurt huffed with a cocked brow, "no consolation necessary. From what I felt, there wasn't much down there to take care of, anyway."

Sebastian stepped closer, Kurt's eyes fluttering shut as he felt his hot breath against his cheek. "You want to take another look for yourself, Princess?" Sebastian asked huskily, his voice a slightly cracked baritone. He leaned in closer to whisper in his ear, "I promise not to disappoint."

He smiled against Kurt's ear as he heard him lightly gasp at his words before the designer cleared his throat. Kurt took a step away and looked into his green eyes, his voice shaking, "I, um,... I think I'll pass...f-for now."

Sebastian watched him with an amused smirk before the tip of his tongue darted out and ran across his bottom lip. He shrugged nonchalantly and turned back to face the mirror, "Suit yourself; I'm a very patient man."

"Ha!" Kurt's eyes widened, obviously not meaning to laugh out loud. Before Sebastian could turn around he recovered and added, "Patient? Since when?"

"You keep forgetting a lot of time has passed since we first met, Hummel. I'm not the same guy I was." He smiled cheekily, "Besides, seduction sometimes requires a fair amount of patience if you're in it for the challenge."

Kurt felt his blood run cold, "Is that what this is, then?" He arched his brow as he began putting his sewing supplies away. "You're going through all this effort just to get into my pants?"

"Well, technically I already have," Sebastian responded as he pointed at the pants he was wearing, "but in all seriousness, no. This is just me being whatever you need me to be...even if that happens to be a human pincushion." He walked over to Kurt and gently tugged on his arm to make him turn and face him, "You can trust me, Kurt."

"Hm...," Kurt hummed as his mind flashed back to all of those times Sebastian-of-old had treated he and his friends like garbage. How he incessantly chased Blaine or the time he blackmailed Finn. But he also gave Karofsky another chance and the guy threatened to kill him after he basically mouth raped him. So, would a second chance with a side of forgiveness really be too much to give Sebastian Smythe?

"I forgive you...Sebastian...for everything," Kurt said as he looked away. "And I do trust you. I trust you with my son and now my friendship...but it's going to take some time for me to trust anyone with my heart, let alone you."

Sebastian smiled as he softly said, "Like I said before, I'm a very patient man."

 

\---------------------------------

"God, that skirt is hideous," Kurt said to Rachel as they sat in the food court of the mall. The Tony award-winning actress had insisted on the two of them going out for a little while, seeing how they hardly had much time lately.

"Kurt, as much as I've missed stranger-critiquing with you, that's not why we're here," Rachel said with a smile.

"O...kay," Kurt said as he straightened up in his seat. "Then why are we here?"

"I wanted to see how you were doing...without your buffer around." As he opened his mouth to defend himself Rachel held up her hands, "I get it, Kurt. He's completely unbiased when it comes to you and Blaine, unlike the rest of us. I mean, obviously Mercedes, Santana and myself will always be on your side, but Sam, Tina... I get it. He seems to be opening you up a bit lately."

Kurt almost choked on his latte with her choice of words, "Oh, yeah. He's...well, really, there isn't any opening of...of anything there. He's just...really helped me out of my stupor-- and by 'helped' I mean he just shoved me right out of it." He let out a sigh as he looked around the mall, "I've come to terms with the fact that Blaine's moved on."

"And have you?" Rachel asked, her hand snaking across the table to cover Kurt's.

"I have," he replied as he watched their hands. "I mean, we'll always have Hudson to connect us, but unfortunately he seems to be too busy for him, too. I just...," he shook his head, "it doesn't make any sense, Rachel. It was just so sudden and, really, his explanation was pretty weak."

"Poor kid must be taking it pretty hard...but Sebastian seems to be helping. Are you sure you can trust him, though? I mean, with the rock salt, the blackmail, trying to break you guys up--"

"I know, Rach...but he's different now. After Karofsky, he made a voluntary effort to change and most of us just let him be. I've chosen to give him another chance...it's what any of us would do for each other. And Hudson just loves him."

Rachel watched Kurt as he diverted his gaze to his goal coffee cup. She bit her bottom lip, "And what about Blaine?"

Kurt cocked his brow as he looked up at her, "What about him?"

"How does he feel about you and Sebastian...and Hudson?"

Kurt scoffed, "Rachel Berry, are you actually expecting me to give a shit about anything Blaine thinks about this situation? He's the one who filed for divorce, the one who moved on to Chandler-- rather quickly, I might add-- and he's the one who hasn't bothered to make time for our child." He brought the cup to his lips and took a swig before he shrugged, "He can build a bridge and get over it. Better yet, build a bridge and come see his damn child. His birthday is in two days and he hasn't spoken to him in a week."

Rachel leaned back in her seat, "Well, you may get your wish. He's probably just ashamed of himself and feels like he abandoned you and Hudson."

"Understandable, considering he did."

Rachel smiled, "Sebastian really has had quite the influence on you."

"That or hanging out with Santana at the bar." Kurt closed his eyes and sighed, "Can we drop this subject now, please? I promised myself I wouldn't let Blaine dominate my thoughts any longer than necessary." His brow furrowed as he picked up his phone when it started ringing, the name 'BLAINE' flashing across the screen. He rolled his eyes, "Speak of the devil...," He said before he swiped to answer and brought the phone to his ear, "Hello?"

 

"Hey, Kurt," Blaine greeted from the other end. "I'm sorry I haven't gotten into contact recently. Things have been--"

 

"Hectic," Kurt interjected. "I know. Things have been pretty busy around here, too. Hudson misses you."

 

"I miss him, too," Blaine said quietly. "Which is why I'm headed out there right now so I can see him for his birthday."

 

Kurt arched a brow, "Oh?" He kept his voice calm, "And when should we be expecting you?"

 

"I'll be in town probably by the end of the day, but I've already made a reservation at a hotel. I'll probably swing by in a couple days."

 

Kurt's face turned red, his inner voice seethed with anger. What the hell?

 

"Blaine," Kurt said, "do you expect me to go home after this conversation and continue to see our son's sadness about this disconnection from his father and not tell him that the father he's been missing so terribly is in the same town as him for two days?"

 

"Well, I just thought--"

 

"You just thought he would be so elated to see you on his birthday that it would ease your guilt for you blatant neglect of him? Not even a damn phone call, Blaine?" Kurt sighed, "Fine. If that's how you want to play it, then go right on ahead and play it, but I won't lie to our son for you." Before Blaine could respond, Kurt hung up the phone and muttered under his breath, "Asshole."

 

Rachel reached across the table and rested her hand on top of Kurt's in consolation, "He's not trying to be an ass, you know?"

 

Kurt shook his head, "I know he isn't. We're both trying not to make this any more awkward than it has to be and by doing so we're making it more awkward."

 

"Well, maybe it doesn't have to be awkward?" Rachel said as she pulled her hand back and crossed her arms on top of the table with a shrug, "I mean, you were both together for so long and the last time you broke up--"

 

"The last time we broke up Blaine was dating Karofsky," Kurt interjected.

 

"Okay, true, but the one thing all of your breakups had in common was the fact that the two of you could still be friends."

 

Kurt sighed, "I know, but that was different. We didn't have a kid that he was neglecting back then."

 

"Well, I can't justify that for him, but I'm sure the distance isn't helping much. Maybe you can take this chance to hear him out?"

 

Kurt shrugged, "Maybe. Honestly, I'm just looking forward to seeing the look on his face when he sees Sebastian there."

 

\-----------------------------------------------------

 

 "Are you fucking serious?" Sebastian questioned incredulously after Kurt explained the whole situation with Blaine.

 

"Language," Kurt admonished softly. "Hudson already hears enough swearing from Santana; I don't need him to get it from you, too."

 

Sebastian sighed before he crossed the room and gently shut the bedroom door. He then turned back to face Kurt and shoved his hands into his pockets, "I understand that this is hurting you because it's been hurting Hudson. I also understand that you don't want to tell him his dad is in town in case he doesn't show up."

 

"Then what's the problem?" Kurt asked with a shrug.

 

"The problem is how you seem pretty intent on him seeing me," Sebastian answered as he sat down on the bed. "Kurt, I know that I told you I'll be whatever you needed me to be, but--"

 

"Oh, for the love of Gaga, Smythe," Kurt interrupted, "I was talking about the look on his face when he sees you've been a better father figure to Hudson than he has lately, not when he thinks we've been screwing." He paused and inhaled sharply, "Not...that we see you as his dad or...or anything."

 

Sebastian smirked, "Don't sweat it, Hummel." If he didn't know any better, he'd say Kurt was starting to fall for him. So he definitely didn't want to know any better.

 

Kurt looked back at Sebastian and smiled softly. He took a deep breath and turned his attention to the picture of himself and Hudson on the bedside table. It used to be a picture of the entire family, but he had folded Blaine behind them. He just couldn't bring himself to rip him away completely; they were still a family, right?

 

But, Blaine had moved on to someone new and he was still Hudson's dad, right? He'd showered Hudson with as much love as Kurt had before the divorce. He didn't give up his custody to shrug Hudson off; he did it for Kurt. He knew he was taking away everything that had made Kurt happy, but he could leave Hudson behind. That was definitely a Blaine thing to do. Could that be why he's kept his distance? Was he ashamed?

 

It didn't matter, not to Kurt, anyway; at least, not completely. Blaine didn't have to explain himself to Kurt. Kurt could live out the rest of his life without knowing why Blaine had been so distant from their son for the past year. It's Hudson that needs to know; he deserves that much.

 

Then there was Sebastian. The boy Kurt had spent so much time loathing had grown into a gentleman, albeit with some traces of his old traits. If Blaine could move on so quickly, why couldn't Kurt? Didn't he deserve that more than anybody? While Blaine had run off to Chandler and they'd been living so carefree, Kurt was the one feeding their son, clothing him, getting him off to school and tucking him into bed with the help of his friends...and Sebastian. He put on this show of sacrificing himself to care for Hudson, but really he was just distracting himself from facing his own pain and Sebastian was quick to see right through it. He's spent so much time pushing Kurt to just do it and find himself again and unlike most people he wasn't pushing Hudson aside in the process. He had never entertained the thought. Could this be his family's second chance?

 

He'd already lost so much of his family. First his mom when he was young, then Finn. It just wasn't right. He remembered how he felt when he lost his mom, how dark his world got, and he couldn't help but wonder if Hudson felt the same way. Sure, Blaine was still alive, but in the past year he may as well have been dead. At a young age, like his father, Hudson had seen his family be torn. Kurt wiped away a tear as he felt it sting his cheek.

 

"He's asked me; Hudson, I mean," Kurt finally said, "he's asked me if you were gonna be his new dad."

 

"And what did you say?"

 

Kurt chuckled softly, "I told him I wasn't sure. What else could I have said?" He gasped lightly when he felt the pull in his hand when Sebastian grabbed it, He turned around, his eyes red and watery, and looked up at him.

 

"That even if I wasn't, I will always be there for him...just like I'll always be there for you."

 

Kurt felt the corner of his mouth twitch upward as he looked into Sebastian's eyes. He had spent the past year fighting any and every feeling that threatened to see the light of day, but no more. That war, from this moment on, is over and it was Sebastian who ended it. He put his hand on Sebastian's bicep and sighed, "Oh, to hell with it. Kiss me, Smythe."

 

And before Sebastian could oblige, Kurt had already braced his other hand behind Sebastian's neck and pulled him into a deep kiss. He let out a slight moan when he felt Sebastian's hands grip his hips and responded with deepening the kiss more. It was like fireworks were going off in a stadium and the crowd was launching into a thunderous cheer. Kurt pulled away just long enough to rip Sebastian's shirt off and then he was back to kissing him. He continued the kiss as he guided Sebastian backward towards the bed then pushed him back onto it.

 

Sebastian sighed as he looked up at Kurt who was removing his own shirt, "Are you sure?"

 

Kurt tossed his shirt aside and said, "Ass pounding now, deep adult conversation later." He then straddled Sebastian and let his feelings take him away.

 

 

 


End file.
